He has had enough to pay for the assisted living he's in and I'm feeling very guilty I didn't look into this sooner. I live 1,100 miles away. My sister has had a history of taking money from them account. She took $8,000 from my moms account before she passed in Nov. $10,000 since Dec. out of my dad's account. I'll be going up 1st week in June and not sure my course of action. Just found out about this today and was too furious to call my sister until I calmed down! I truly do feel so guilty to have trusted her.
I would ask about the withdrawls and back up to prove what they were used for Dad. If she can't do that then explain to her that POA means Dads money is for dad. She is not allowed to use it on herself. If she says she is paying herself, then explain that has to be written in the POA and what amount she can be paid. Otherwise, with no proof of what the money was spent on, she needs to return it. Tell her if Dad needs Medicaid, they will question withdrawls.
Plus sometimes the family needs to order and deliver Depends type products and believe me, that can run up the best budgets. Cost of new clothing as one in Assisted Living usually ruin their clothes sooner than later. Some facilities charge extra for cable service and for landline phone services. I've been down that road with my own Dad and all the costs involved.
So sorry to read that your Mom had passed on. It could be that your sister took the $8k to be placed into Dad's account, since usually the spouse inherits the late spouse's assets. She could be using it for Dad's care. Thus you need to be careful before accusing her of pocketing the money
Curious, how did you find out that certain amounts were taken [or used] from the account?
You did nothing wrong, you gave her the benefit of the doubt. She is the guilty one and should pay for being so greedy.