i am always very upset when i address my mother. i wind up yelling at her and she is already emotionally fragile. as am i. i feel terrible afterwards but it seems like it always happens. she is 66 and i'm 43. she has type 2 diabetes, edema and is basically bedridden because she is in pain when she walks or stands. we don't live together but she lives under my husband and i in an apartment. i brought her to live near us because my mother in law passed away by herself and they found her body outside of her building. that same year i flew my mother from 1,000 miles away to live near us but it's been hell ever since. from nursing homes to hospitals to her apartment and back. several times this has happened for two years and we are both exhausted mentally, physically and emotionally. i am burned out. she has no grip strength and she constantly spills medicine on the floor. so i got her a pill container for everyday. she did the same. so now i have her metformin and i'm running up and down the stairs every day to give her one pill so she can take it. i asked her, where do i put (the pill). she pointed to the bed and said there. so i put it on the bed. she said "not on the bed! i poured bleach on the bed!" so i get upset and yelled "you just told me there!" and we get into it. she said i was making her blood pressure go up so i warmed up her food and left. i don't know what to do! this is how we communicate and it tears me up inside because she is my mother and i love hjer. i hate seeing her so fragile and messed up but i am literally the last relative.
You should get a good therapist and cognitive counselor (none of that online nonsense) and you need to come to some conclusions. The choices are yours. Will you throw your own life on the burning funeral pyre of your parent or will you go on makng a quality life of your own.
No one can make this choice for you, sadly.
Caregiveing is so stressful.
I'm so sorry for you, you are young and so is your mom. Have you been thinking and making plans for the future, of moms care?
Id say put in your mind right now how much you are willing to do for mom and how long you are going to be her caregiver. Promise yourself that you will not do more than you can handle.
It sounds like your very stressed and getting at the end of your rope.
I am not sure, as far as what professionals say, but my dad had diabetes and there has been quite a few other families and friends. From what I see, it really effects the brain specially if the diabetes is not controlled.
My mil the Sweetest most wonderful person I've ever known, once told me when her blood sugar was off (I honestly can't remember if she said, high or low) she could stab someone. This right there tells me a lot on the effects of diabetes on the brain.
So this could be some of the issues, understanding this my help you .
Google "the Gray Rock Method" that may help.