My father moved into our home at the end of June 2018, just a bit over a month ago. He was very unhappy with his previous living arrangements and felt he was not getting the support he needs. Dad is 87 years old and has stage four Parkinson’s Disease. He uses a walker, sometimes a wheelchair if he is having a very bad day. He is also dealing with anxiety, sometimes quite overwhelming for him on an almost daily basis. He is on levodopa/carbidopa 5 times a day with a CR tablet at night. He is also on 50 mg of quitanapine and lorazepam 2 mg 2 times a day as required to ease the anxiety. He has wanted to be taken to the ER at least once a week. We took him the first time but his symptoms seem to disappear as soon as a decision is made to go, so of course, once we get there the doctor has nothing to address. Twice now, when I try to figure out what “I feel crappy” means, nausea? headache? pain?, he says he doesn’t know, if I ask what he would like the ER doctor to help with, he tells me to “read my POA” or “they can just kill me”. I ask him if he would like some acetaminophen or lorazepam when he obviously anxious. He gets angry with me when we tell him that the ER doctor needs to know more than “I feel crappy” so he/she knows how to help, and that the ER doctor won’t kill him. I’m not sure how to deal with this sort of behaviour to help ease his physical and mental pain. Any advice would be so welcome.
Just a thought.
Mad with me when I said more information required. His doctor was sure it was linked to anxiety and attention seeking to get me to his home cause he was scared. This does not happen now as he sees medical staff in care facility.
Maybe the nurse coming in will be best solution. Good Luck. Know its not easy and you cannot win
If this is not an option you want to take at this time keep it in mind for later.
It is possible that he is stressed about the move. Do not know if it was a local move or a long distance move but any change can cause anxiety. If he moved away from friends and an area he knew well this may be causing more stress.
I’m wondering if it wouldn’t help to have a visiting nurse come by once a week or so. She could do a cursory exam of Dad and pronounce him “fine”. He could share his “feeling crappy” with her instead of you and the ER. He may need to be tested for a UTI although there are usually no symptoms.
Was Dad previously in a facility? If so, he was not happy with the care and not enough attention? He’s had a change of scenery and caregivers but maybe not of attitude. His protestations may be a bid for attention and this is why you should have him evaluated for dementia. My father-in-law had PD and after about 5 years also had dementia. It shouldn’t be difficult to get him to the doctor as he knows it will be all about him there.
She has been in a NH since with several hospital stays of up to 5 weeks. About 2 weeks ago, she started asking the facility to send her to the ER. She is now asking daily, and cries and raises a fit because they can find no reason to send her. It's a part of her bipolar disorder and a desire to be the center of attention.
I am so glad that it is up to the facility to decide whether or not she needs to go to the ER and not on me. I am in no hurry fro her to come home but I do see her daily, usually about 5 hours.