Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
✔
I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
✔
I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
pazzo, to add to my post from above, my Mom [98] thought the long-term-care facility was a hotel, and that I had a room down the hall. I had to run with that idea as it was easier then telling my Mom where she was now living.
My Mom use to get upset with my Dad [who would visit her every day for a hour] that he was out sightseeing without her.... [sigh].
Ciao pazzo I have both lied and told the truth to my mom who is nearly 93 and in memory care now since February following several falls at home- she's feisty and doesn't like any answer I give her - sometimes she thinks she's in a hotel (usually in Vegas ) and other times she thinks she's in her house and wants the other residents out - she always wants me to sleep with her
Depending on her mood telling her she's in a care facility is cruel because she realizes she's been locked up and cries knowing she has to stay there forever - her words - she once eloped and drew a map of how to get home intent on walking there - I regret everyday leaving her there since there are no other residents her age to form a friendship with - either very late stage or 10-15 years younger
I do the best I can with visits usually in the evening and bring treats - I also hire personal caregivers to give her one on one attention for at least 4 hours a day - other than 1 other family friend and our housekeeper she has no visitors - my siblings are in their 70s and won't participate
Staff at memory care is overwhelmed chasing late stage wanderers and I've noticed none of their caregivers even when they have an xtra moment spend any time talking to the residents but sit with themselves - how very lonely for those with no family at all
So if you feel your mom is being cared for (most important thing) then respond in a manner least upsetting to her even though she may ask again - my mom has hit her head many times during falls and has no short term memory but she is hungry for attention Buona fortuna
If you have repeatedly explained that your mom cannot come home, then I would question if she is able to comprehend the information or is she forgetting the information. Do you know if that is the case? If she's not able to comprehend it, then you aren't likely to get her to understand. If she understands, but forgets after you tell her, then that is also possible. The only thing that I know is to keep reminding her in a normal tone and change the subject to keep her from getting upset. I'm not aware of any other way to handle it.
pazzo1, since we don't know what medical issues your Mom has, I will assume she has memory issues.
If that is the case, what I did with my Mom who had late stage dementia [due to a head trauma fall], any time my Mom asked when can she go home I would answer "maybe tomorrow" and that was enough to keep her happy.... until she asked the same question the next day to which I gave the same answer.
Thanks freqflyer! My mom is 94 and has spent the last 6 months in and out of the hospital with various physical medical problems including a fractured hip. Prior to that she had been living alone in her home. At this point she is unable to walk, and needs major assistance with all her personal care. We got her into a snf about 3 months ago and they are doing a great job with her care. she is just very resistant to the idea that this is the last chapter and cannot believe we, her children, cannot care for her in our homes. We all live away, me being the closest (180 miles away) and are in our 60's and 70's! Her mental state is good but not always based in reality. I have been visiting every other week for just a few hours and have tried to get her engaged in activities, etc. I am thinking I need to back off even more and let the reality of her new world settle in. Her aides know her very well and also reinforce the necessity of her being there for her care. Just frustrated by her unhappiness but I am guessing the reality is just too hard for her to accept.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
My Mom use to get upset with my Dad [who would visit her every day for a hour] that he was out sightseeing without her.... [sigh].
I have both lied and told the truth to my mom who is nearly 93 and in memory care now since February following several falls at home- she's feisty and doesn't like any answer I give her - sometimes she thinks she's in a hotel (usually in Vegas ) and other times she thinks she's in her house and wants the other residents out - she always wants me to sleep with her
Depending on her mood telling her she's in a care facility is cruel because she realizes she's been locked up and cries knowing she has to stay there forever - her words - she once eloped and drew a map of how to get home intent on walking there - I regret everyday leaving her there since there are no other residents her age to form a friendship with - either very late stage or 10-15 years younger
I do the best I can with visits usually in the evening and bring treats - I also hire personal caregivers to give her one on one attention for at least 4 hours a day - other than 1 other family friend and our housekeeper she has no visitors - my siblings are in their 70s and won't participate
Staff at memory care is overwhelmed chasing late stage wanderers and I've noticed none of their caregivers even when they have an xtra moment spend any time talking to the residents but sit with themselves - how very lonely for those with no family at all
So if you feel your mom is being cared for (most important thing) then respond in a manner least upsetting to her even though she may ask again - my mom has hit her head many times during falls and has no short term memory but she is hungry for attention
Buona fortuna
If that is the case, what I did with my Mom who had late stage dementia [due to a head trauma fall], any time my Mom asked when can she go home I would answer "maybe tomorrow" and that was enough to keep her happy.... until she asked the same question the next day to which I gave the same answer.