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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
I haven't been in that situation before, but, I can only imagine how difficult it must be to do this, but, certainly, you have given it a lot of thought and the circumstances require it. Placing a loved one in a place where they can be cared for and protected, is a very loving and kind thing. I'd try to focus on that. I'd try to avoid having expectations that he will feel abandoned. I'd try to think in a positive way. Even if he doesn't understand what's going on, he can feel that you are confident and at peace with it.
When I placed my loved one into a MC facility, she seemed to feel more content. It was as if she sensed that they knew how to care for her and that she was with other people with her condition.
I'd discuss the transition into the facility with the admissions director and make a plan. I'd listen to their recommendations.
My dear, you certainly must be distraught I applaud you for finding this site and seeking information
Please visit it often and ask questions
At 93, is your husband still mobile or have any other health issues? Do you have children who are involved in his care ? Are you both close in age ?
My 93 year old mom has been in a memory care facility for a year and my observation is that the men adjust much easier than the women- perhaps because they're used to being taken care
Hubby will be in a memory care facility. Yes, his children are involved in his care. We went to the facility today for a tour. All of us are happy with what we saw and heard.
Between the personnel there and your answers, I know all will go smoothly.
Cheyenne my heart goes out to you. Nearly everyone in my caregivers' group had to place their loved one over the time they belonged to the group. It was always an agonizing decision, and seemed especially hard on spouses.
Having read a lot about my husband's disease I knew that the most likely path would be to a care center. So I never promised him I won't place him in a care center. I did promise that I would never abandon him. I would always advocate for him, visit with him, and love him, even if he someday had to go somewhere else for the best care.
One day we drove by a large new nursing home. He said, "I don't ever want to be in a place like that." I replied, "I don't want you there, either. I hope you can always stay at home with me. We are doing pretty good so far, aren't we? But if the disease got worse and you needed more care than I could give you, I would find a place that could give you that care. Trust me to do what is best for you. But no matter what happens, I will never, ever abandon you."
Abandonment is really the issue, isn't it? You may feel that you've abandoned him and he may feel abandoned. That would really, really be painful. But you are of sound mind. You KNOW you are trying to do the best for him and for you. You are following up the "better or worse" "sickness and health" parts of your vows. He is not of sound mind, so he may need some convincing and reassurance that you will always be his wife and you will always seek what is best for him.
I hope the transition goes smoothly for you both. Keep sharing your story with us. We care, and we learn from each other.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
When I placed my loved one into a MC facility, she seemed to feel more content. It was as if she sensed that they knew how to care for her and that she was with other people with her condition.
I'd discuss the transition into the facility with the admissions director and make a plan. I'd listen to their recommendations.
I applaud you for finding this site and seeking information
Please visit it often and ask questions
At 93, is your husband still mobile or have any other health issues? Do you have children who are involved in his care ?
Are you both close in age ?
My 93 year old mom has been in a memory care facility for a year and my observation is that the men adjust much easier than the women- perhaps because they're used to being taken care
Please let us know how it goes
Between the personnel there and your answers, I know all will go smoothly.
Having read a lot about my husband's disease I knew that the most likely path would be to a care center. So I never promised him I won't place him in a care center. I did promise that I would never abandon him. I would always advocate for him, visit with him, and love him, even if he someday had to go somewhere else for the best care.
One day we drove by a large new nursing home. He said, "I don't ever want to be in a place like that." I replied, "I don't want you there, either. I hope you can always stay at home with me. We are doing pretty good so far, aren't we? But if the disease got worse and you needed more care than I could give you, I would find a place that could give you that care. Trust me to do what is best for you. But no matter what happens, I will never, ever abandon you."
Abandonment is really the issue, isn't it? You may feel that you've abandoned him and he may feel abandoned. That would really, really be painful. But you are of sound mind. You KNOW you are trying to do the best for him and for you. You are following up the "better or worse" "sickness and health" parts of your vows. He is not of sound mind, so he may need some convincing and reassurance that you will always be his wife and you will always seek what is best for him.
I hope the transition goes smoothly for you both. Keep sharing your story with us. We care, and we learn from each other.