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I don't live with my MIL, my husband & son do. Is it normal to have social workers calling me asking personal questions about me? This is about caring for MIL!

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Hospice companies (good ones) do a phenomenal job of helping the family as well as the patient. You can politely decline any of their attempt to involve you or stay in touch if it doesn't make you comfortable.

My mom is on hospice now, and I politely declined the services of their chaplain as I'm not a religious sort and that doesn't bring me any comfort. The chaplain was totally fine with it. I've developed a fantastic relationship with my mom's hospice nurse, so she's my go-to for any questions.

On the other hand, when my dad was on hospice two years ago, I fired the first company when I asked the social worker what services they offered to the family, and she snidely said, "This isn't about YOU!" That was the final straw with that woman, as she'd pulled a few less-than-compassionate doozies already.

A good hospice company lets the family take the lead. You tell them what services you want for yourselves and they should be respectful of that, but perhaps you should familiarize yourself with what hospice does for the family, too., so you aren't so taken aback by normal requests.
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All hospice agencies have their own social workers, and yes, they are really there for the family members, and not the one being cared for. They do want to get to know the family and want to know how to be able to help you as your MIL is on this journey.
When my husband was under hospice care the social worker would come to our house and sit down and talk to me for an hour or so, every month, just wanting to be supportive, as having a loved one in your house who is dying can be very stressful for the family. She would also call occasionally to check up on me as well. All of this is very normal, so don't fret. Just accept whatever help is offered. Wishing you the best.
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Nicely tell the SW that you initially made the call but you are not involved in the care of ur MIL. That your husband should be their contact since he is, for now, living with her.

You don't need to give SWs any information you are not comfortable in giving. My Mom was on hospice for a week and I never had a SW call me. I was there when Mom was admitted and gave the info they needed for Moms care.
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Are you POA? What are you worried about? These are contact numbers for your MIL. Hospice is covered by Medicare. Have you signed papers? Ask them for reassurance over whatever concerns you. Communicate with your Hospice team. They are there for you. It doesn't do too much good to ask us; ask them the reasons they are requesting your numbers. As a part of the Hospice "team" you will be offered many things. Grief counseling, clergy of your choice, etc. And most of all an opportunity to ask questions. That's what they are there for. They will also do followup after death. For as much as a year often enough. You can ask for so many things, including the lower cost funeral services of your area, etc.And again, Hospice is almost 100% covered by medicare almost always, including such things as hospital bed rental which is free to you, other equipment as well.
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Ask them why they want this information.
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Do you not want hospice to have this information?

It is most likely something as simple as having a family contact list.

You aren’t required to pass along this information to them if you object.

Why don’t you ask your husband or son what information they gave?

Maybe it is related to his leaving blank spaces and she is only interested in completing the forms.

Hospice is wonderful at keeping patients comfortable. They also offer services such as counseling to the entire family which is why they may have called you.

Best wishes to you and your family.
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I recently called for Hospice/palliative care for my mother. That was a week ago.

I have gotten calls from the Social Worker, the chaplain, and a family support advocate. They were all very nice.

They may see you as part of the care team.
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Once a family member or LO passes, hospice will contact you offering support and grief services. I was "only a girlfriend" but they check up to make sure you are ok.
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Maybe they are contacting you because you made the initial phone call to them? I would ask them why they want the info.

When my father in law was in hospice, the social worker came to me (I was the one present) asking me all kinds of questions that really irrated me. When she asked me what kind of man my husband was, that was the last straw! Obviously my father in law was not abused, he was 89 and developed sepsis after surgery. I asked her why she was asking me that. She said she wanted to make sure my mother in law would be taken care of when my father-in-law passed. But she really came across as nosey and insulting and I didn't appreciate it.
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NeedHelpWithMom Mar 2021
That is interesting.

Sometimes it is the way a person expresses themselves that is offensive, rather than the inquiry.

She certainly could have worded things differently.

I love the service that hospice provides but I don’t blame you for feeling as you did about that particular social worker.
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No I'm not POA.
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