I am looking for respite care so I can go on a vacation. Where can I find someone that can stay with her for a week? She won’t like it! She hates it when I go away. Last time was in January and my brother stayed with her. It was only 4 days snd she was SO angry with me.
Now-a-days; caregivers are allotted more hours/week.
Respite could come from siblings, other family members or even community support groups and government agencies.
My dad would sometimes get mad when I just took the 4 hr. Wed. respite; let alone a few days holidays, if my friends or others would care for him.
However, I would make a big deal about missing him and how nice it was to see him again, etc. That did diffuse a lot of the anger. As well, I would have some arrangement for when I returned that fully included him. i.e. we had a dinner to go out for or we had a special meal made or we went for a drive, etc.
I think it gave him an anchor to hold on to; looking forward to my return was also knowing that I would return.
I think it took away the fear and replaced it with hope. Albeit, he did have to be reminded of 'the celebration' that was to come; when I returned. That means, everybody is on board with the plan of telling him the plan for 'when I returned'.
In other words, I go for 2 days: he gets upset - whomever looked after him, kept reminding him about the "celebration' to come -- no the fact that I 'had left him'.
It worked! I only did this about 8 times in the entire 7 years. So, 16 days in 7 years.
I needed those breaks to keep sane. Alzheimer's is a terrible disease. This is just an idea, to, maybe try.