She is mobile with a walker sometimes. She has frozen shoulders, so raising arms is not an option extremely afraid of falling , has bad knees and is on the heavy side, She has COPD, asthma and heart failure, I just want to be able to safely get her in the car.
I'd seek advice from an expert in how to best treat her pain. I can't stress enough how horrible it is. I hope you can find some help and transportation to get her to help or get the help to come to her. I'd treat it as an emergency. She may not be able to describe what she's feeling due to the dementia.
I built small platform steps for her. I only needed about two inches for van and garage but four inches for the bed. These saved my back and lessened stress for her.
And the one for the van was just tucked into the back. She did not use or need a chair or walker.
Much of the problem was because she was just too short and getting weak.
But then, one can rent a van by the day.
I hope you find something that helps you get her out and about safely. Being stuck at home sucks.
https://www.amazon.com/s?k=car+handle+assist+for+elderly&crid=ZX16SRFY77BD&sprefix=car+handle%2Caps%2C226&ref=nb_sb_ss_ts-a-p_1_10
The car handle thingy is particularly helpful for getting my overweight and wheelchair bound mother into my car. It just slips right into the side of the car door, no installation required, and provides a handle for her to hold onto. Like Grandma1954 said, a gait belt is also a life saver when trying to transfer someone.
https://www.amazon.com/s?k=gait+belts+transfer+belts&crid=1I9IEJPRSD0ZU&sprefix=gait+belt%2Caps%2C198&ref=nb_sb_ss_ts-a-p_1_9
Getting some guidance from a physical therapist isn't a bad idea, either. They tend to have helpful tips we'd never even think of to use in such situations.
Good luck!
I would have my husband turn and sit on the bag on the seat of the car. As I picked up his legs to get them into the car I would rotate his legs at the same time and the bag allowed him to slide easily into place. Exiting the car was just as easy, I would take his feet and swing them out while turning his legs. I would place the walker by the door and with him holding the walker and me holding the Gait Belt I would help him up.
This was all great UNTIL It became more difficult to get him to turn his body properly to be able to sit on the seat. I was afraid of him getting hurt ( in older people most hip fractures are BREAK then FALL not Fall and break) At that point the car rides stopped. Everything I did was based on SAFETY either his safety or mine. So if it becomes more dangerous to get her into the car then you have to make the decision to stop.
A few simply techniques made all the difference. I can't explain them, but they may be available on YouTube, if you can't find a PT to help you.