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My husband is mid-stage Alzheimer's and very bored and restless. His first cousin died unexpectedly about a week ago and I had to tell him we cannot go to memorial. It is 500 miles from our home. He has been more restless, confused and agitated since then. I can't say with certainty that caused the changes but the stress seemed to trigger current changes. We have aids 2 to 4 times each week, which is helpful to us both. We have a day program just one mile from home.


I am writing because I'm curious about other people's experiences, pro and con, with day care programs.



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I will tell you that everyone that I know that has taken their loved ones to our local Adult Daycare Center have loved it.
The participants love it and so do the family members, as it gives them much needed breaks from caregiving.
They offer breakfast, lunch and a snack and have different activities every day. They also offer "spa" days where they will give your loved one a shower, and wash and style their hair if wanted.
And you can have your loved one there 5 days a week up to 8 hours a day, and they also offer financial help if it's needed.
It's a win win for all involved, and the fact that you have one so close to your house is a blessing for sure. I would certainly have your husband try it out and see how you and he like it.
I would certainly
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Debmiller Apr 6, 2024
Thank you!
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My Husband participated in an "organized" Adult Day Program and it was great for me as I was able to get things done and get a break. He never said much about what he did. He did try to leave and after t attempts I was asked not to bring him back. I found a Memory Care facility that took him a few days a week. He seemed to adjust to that. And I used the same facility for Respite when I took a vacation.

I know many people that have had good luck with the Adult Day programs and some not so much.
The best thing to do is try it. Give him time to adjust to it. Find out if they have outings. What programs they have. One by me would take participants to a farm where they had therapy horses. A friend of min her husband LOVED the art therapy (his pictures were amazing)

Look at the program as doing as much for YOU as it does for him (maybe even more)
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Deb, if he suddenly seems more confused, please get him tested for a UTI.
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Debmiller Apr 6, 2024
I will. Thanks.
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There are day care programs for dementia patients in my community but we haven’t used them. The reason is that they’ve never convinced me that they are protecting the participants enough from the diseases going around - Covid, RSV, and colds. As we know, a bout with pneumonia can take an elder out.

It’s not worth it to us to take that chance.
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Debmiller Apr 7, 2024
I am actually acquainted with a woman whose husband caught covid there during pandemic. She spent time in ICU. He entered hospice and died. I will give that risk more thought.
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Bringing my Mom to my home was temporary. She had enough money for 1 year in AL. I was waiting for the house to sell to get enough money 2 years. Mom was easy to care for, I am just not a Caregiver. After a year living with me, my daughter suggested Daycare when the house did not sell. I chose M, W, and F days. This gave her a day of rest and a weekend. She was 88 at the time. Bus came for her at 8am and dropped her off at 3pm. This gave me time to get showered and my DH and I then went to breakfast and did errands. She was given therapy, breakfast and lunch, activities and a shower. It was nice.

Medicaid help some of the people with the cost.
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The daycare programs in our area have wonderful activities. They serve breakfast and lunch.

You can call them and speak to them directly about any concerns.

The senior community centers are nice too. Their website is online. They will posts their information on activities and a schedule of events. They also serve lunch.

If you are looking for a longer break from caregiving, some assisted living facilities offer a respite service so that family members can take a vacation.

I know someone who places her dad in a respite program for two weeks out of the year so she can travel.
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