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SharonAS I am so sorry for what you're going through. A few weeks before my husband passed he was moving furniture and just trying to destroy everything. He was already on all sorts of medication for Alzheimers. His doctor increased Seroquel but it didn't help as it had in the past. Later I found out that he had pneumonia when it progressed. At that point though he would fight everyone and nothing was really done for him to fight the infection partly because he wouldn't let them and partly because they felt the Alzheimers had gone too far.

Your problems may be totally different from what I went through but I understand exactly how you feel. Could she have some underling cause like urinary tract infection?

What I discovered at that time when I desperately needed help, there was none. Nursing homes knew he was combative and would not take him. I never thought this could happen but it did. I thought they had staff that could handle these situations. I was forced to get Hospice in. Various types of medications did not help. In the end I had to call 911 and he was taken to the hospital where he was medicated and never seemed alert again before everything failed and he passed.

It was a true nightmare for me. I can only imagine what he went through but I didn't know what else to do.

I am sorry if this answer doesn't help but I just related to the experiences you are having and how you're feeling. I read a few comments questioning what you meant by wanting out. If you haven't been there like I was, you probably aren't able to understand the desperation in your post. I guess that is really all I wanted to convey to you.

May God be with you in this. Amen
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TobeyOrnott May 2021
I’m so sorry for your loss and to the OP for the desperation. I’m there too. I’m covered in bruises and was beaten with a heavy electric guitar Saturday. I’m on blood thinners. It’s likely I won’t survive his illness. I have no resources and am depleted in every way.
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I have the same advice. Do again as has been done before;

"When she melted down in his office (GP) and he had an ambulance take her to the hospital".

What needs to change is what happens next.

Question title is "Just want out". The really hard questions that come to my mind are 'do you want OUT.. of caregiving completely or maybe partially? Or is it a different thing you want, like, a cure?

If 'Out' it is, then being discharged to your home needs to stop. How does she currently get back back home from hospital? Does she get transported or do you collect her?

I think when you are so deep into crises it is hard to think & plan. But some 'blue & white hat' thinking is usually helpful. (Leave the more emotional hats off briefly).
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Hospital should not have sent her home! They were wrong to do that! Next time you take her to hospital…have talk with Social Worker to have her placed permanent in facility.

My mother is 94 years old with dementia & on Seroquel for a long time…sometimes works & then if not…needs to be increased. She does the biting thing too…along with hitting, scratching & cursing. She’s a handful for sure. However, she don’t walk ..& so to go to kitchen & grab knife to kill me…as she keeps threatening.
Hugs 🤗
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BurntCaregiver May 2021
CaregiverL,

When they're not mobile anymore there isn't a real threat. You walk away and let them scream and threaten until they tire themselves out. Or make sure the doctor prescribes a liquid medication like lorazepam, xanax, halidol, clonipin, etc... and administer that medication the same way as you would to a dog, and hold their mouth shut so they can't spit it out.
This sounds harsh but sometimes it's the only way. When it's a home caregiving situation with one caregiver, there is no other way.
When the person is still strong and mobile with no problems getting around, they have to be in facility care. In-home caregiving is not safe then.
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I agree, document her destructive behavior and violence; document any visible signs of her attacks on you. Contact social services and see if they can't evaluate her at your home but do not delay in calling 911 immediately when she places hands on you. Once they have her at the hospital, refuse to take her home. Tell them in no uncertain terms it is not safe for her to be in your house.

I don't know where you live but her Docs sound horrible just passing her off one to another. Is there any way to get the neuro and psych together to make a decision? Maybe you can consider getting a geriatric manager to help get her properly medicated by the appropriate Docs and placed in an appropriate facility.

Best wishes for a quick and efficient conclusion to this disaster.
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Sharon, good advice from others. In addition, I recommend documenting her destructive behaviors and her attacks by recording them with your phone as best as you can and show them to the police. Take pictures of the damages to your properties, too.
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Thank you all so much. It helps just feeling like someone hears you and gets that you're overwhelmed. I feel very isolated and hopeless after seeing so many doctors, and so many hospital/er visits, etc., and getting no help. It's incredibly discouraging. Thank you for the encouragement and advice.
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AliBoBali May 2021
I took my father to countless medical appts for years, with differing opinions, and didn't deal with half the things with his care that you put in your post. I can't imagine what you're going through. If you can keep searching for docs until you find one that is helpful for the situation, that's great and would be a blessing to your mom as well. If you find at some point this situation is too much for you, no one could fault you. Plan for your own life and future, too, as best you can.

This forum is great for ongoing support. You can jump into some of the support threads (if you need a point to some of those, let us know) and post as needed. Or post new threads, too, whatever you want/need to do. You don't have to be alone in this. People around here give good input from their own experiences.
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OMG!!! How have you managed to stand this for more than an hour!! She's going to seriously injure you. As has been suggested, when she starts on her next jag, call 911 (not non emergency number as it might take forever for them to get to you) and tell them that you are being attacked and don't try to sound calm when you make the call. Sound as terrified as you should be .... a little hysterical if need be. They will come and hopefully she will still be on a jag and they will transport her to a hospital which hopefully will transfer to a psych hospital. If necessary file a police report to document any injuries you have or damage to your home. Not sure if the home belongs to you or her but don't let them discharge her back to you!! Also get in touch with your state's Dept on Aging and get some advice from them as to how to best protect yourself while overseeing your Mom.

Good Luck!
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Excellent advice already given. Please get yourself out of this, it’s not your fault that it’s completely out of your ability to handle. Guard your health, there aren’t many second chances to get it back
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This was in one of your previous posts: "There's no money for a home, and my brother basically gave the job to me. He only wants to visit occasionally. I had a terrible childhood, she was mean before and she's mean now. I get so sick of people acting like everyone is taking care of a national treasure. Bad people get dementia and need caregivers too. It's horrible."

And your mother is only 75?! How many years will this go on????

PLEASE PLEASE read and heed the excellent advice already given. You do NOT have to continue to put up with this nightmarish situation! It's clear that everyone, include the medical professionals, expects you to "put up and shut up." I hate that!

Are you the only one with POA, HCPOA? (I'm assuming you have those?)

I worry for your health -- physical, mental and emotional. You are a prisoner to your mother's illness. Keep posting here, and we will encourage you to remove yourself from this situation (remove your mother from your home).
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Next time she starts one of her tirades and gets physical, especially if she lays hands on you, call 911 and let the police or emt take her to th hospital. Let them know she is physically attacking you!! Maybe then she can get the help she so desperately needs. And DO NOT take her back to your home. Tell the social worker that she needs to be placed, you can no longer keep being attacked in your own home. Stand firm on this. Keep repeating if necessary. And shame on her drs that dont help her and you as well!! Hugs and prayers for you! Liz
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Forgive my question if it's a bit naive, but how is she not being Rx'd benzodiazepines at this point? Or something even more powerful if those aren't enough for complex comorbidity. I don't know how old your mom is (75, I see it now) but the time for any doctor's concern about long-term negative effects seems mitigated by the circumstances. Why won't they give her something to calm her? Have they given any reason for that other than it's not their wheelhouse or not their expertise? Of course it's neurological, what does that even mean? You still have to treat behavioral symptoms, for the patient's sake and others around them.

I'm sorry for your circumstances. Sounds terrible. And you might have to do something drastic, like "dump" her at an ER, to get your need for help across in a way that someone finally implements a meds plan for her. :-/
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SharonAS May 2021
She has only been prescribed benzos once and it was just to get her to an appointment with another doctor she was being passed off to. It took a little while but she did a bit better. She really needed them 3 times a day. If you don't keep it in her system when you try to give her anything during her raging will spit it out, won't open her mouth, spit the water out, spit the applesauce out, spit the pudding out, bite you ........ Her GP and his nurse let me know he doesn't prescribe benzos. When she melted down in his office and he had an ambulance take her to the hospital the er psychiatrist said she doesn't prescribe benzos. She was in the geriatric psych unit for over a week and that psychiatrist refused to prescribe benzos. A nurse read me the notes from her stay and she was doing most of the stuff there she does at home and the only thing they gave her coming home from there was Seroquel. Even though the nurse said they had a standing order for shots to calm her and had to restrain her sometimes. The Seroquel does nothing. They'll only give her a low dose of that because of her age and the dementia. She has no quality of life whatsoever so why they care about the addictiveness I don't understand. She has so much anger that she tries to stretch and tear her clothes, sheets, pillows, blankets, the fidget blanket I got her, ..... to the point where she has bruised her fingers. And when she can't tear it she puts it in her mouth and tries to tear it with her teeth and has made her top lip swell doing that. And she keeps that intensity for hours. I don't know how she has the energy. I have video of what she does so they've seen it. I'm praying the psychiatrist she sees next will be willing to prescribe whatever she needs. I've heard good things abt him.
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Geeeeez,

You’re in way over your head! I don’t know how you are still standing. Your story reads like a nightmare.

I am so very sorry that you are in this situation. Of course, you are beyond exhausted. I would be afraid of being harmed or of her accidentally harming herself.

Does she sleep at night or is her behavior totally erratic at all hours?

I wouldn’t hesitate to call 911 immediately for her behavior and hope with all my heart and soul that they will find a way to help her.

I can’t even imagine how much this must effect you emotionally. On one hand, this is your mom. On the other hand, she is an ‘out of control’ person that you can’t possibly connect with.

I hope and pray for peace in your life, now and when this situation is resolved for you and your mom.
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911. Do NOT go to the hospital with her and refuse to pick her up.

I know that this sounds heartless. But stepping back may be the only way to get her the help she deserves.
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Sharon, you can call the police and report a mental illness case that involves domestic violence and destruction of personal property. They will respond and transport her for treatment.

I think that you may have to do this so that she can get the care she needs. It's just atrocious that no doctors are helping her.

You matter as well and you are out of your depth. Time for the hard choices.

I pray that you find a way to do this.

Great big warm hug!
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Wow, this is horrible and intolerable.

Something needs to be done ASAP. How long has this been going on? She's got some serious issues that these doctors need to address! You can NOT live like this. She's going to seriously hurt you or herself.

If it were me, I'd call 911 next time she threatens you or is getting physical with you. This is abusive and her meds need some serious adjustment! I would say that I am scared of her. And once she leaves, I would refuse to allow her back home. If she is in a facility, I bet they will figure out the med situation VERY quickly.

Be careful and take care of yourself.
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