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I have some for my husband but the outside seems like it's rough plastic.

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My late husband wore the men's Depends, and never complained that they were uncomfortable.
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Has he tried them on and said that they are uncomfortable?
What you may feel might be different than what he feels once they are on.
There are washable incontinence garments for men and women but there are drawbacks. They need to be washed (duh) and this will increase your daily laundry.
There are also washable insert pads that can be used if the washable underwear is not as absorbent as you need it to be.
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The lounge brief adult diaper .. look and feel like regular underwear and reusable .. they aren’t cheap though and for disposable (Abena Abri-Form) (Tena Slip)(Depend Fit-Flex) (Prevail Air-Molicare) (NorthShore Supreme)(Attends Advanced) are some others that my patients love
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