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My neighbors have come to help and try to calm her down. I had her outside our condo for a ride in her wheelchair.


She thinks I am trying to kill her and says this will haunt me the rest of my life. Meanwhile, I gave her a shower this morning, made breakfast, and she was sitting on the sofa and wanted to go out.


Screaming Help Me, Help Me, and telling anyone that comes close to call the police, that I am beating her up. Yes, It's AD, stage 6. Suggestions for calming her? Suggestions for placement in a facility? How do I start that?

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She's calm now. We had about 40 minute of screaming. "Come help me. Get the police. She's killing me. Come help me. She's beating me up."

Now she tells me let's forget about it. She says she"doesn't want anything on my record."

I've never hurt her, and this is painful to hear. I keep telling myself this is the disease.
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It sounds very scary and stressful. I don't think I could handle it. I do think that I would immediately report it to her doctor. Any change in mental status should be reported immediately. They may want to check her for a UTI, since they can cause someone to act odd. I'd make sure it's documented with the doctor, because someone in the neighborhood may call and report this to APS. I wouldn't be surprised to get an inquiry from them.

I might also ask for a geriatric psych referral. I know that at later stages of AD, you may not want to expand the number of healthcare providers, but, I would consider that her feelings of fear are distressing for her and may require special attention. I'd explore medication to see if something would help her. It has to be scary to believe that someone is trying to kill you. In her mind it's real at the time.

My LO has never made those comments, however, I have read that calling out, Help or Help me, is quite common with certain conditions that cause dementia. I don't have those details though. Maybe, someone who does, will chime in.

And if you just want to transition your role from a hands on caregiver, I'd consider what she can afford and then have her accessed to see if she needs Memory Care or nursing home. Based on your description, Memory Care might be a good thing to explore, visit, get info, discuss with doctor, etc. And, if she qualifies for financial assistance, get that application going.
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Oh, my. How awful for you and your neighbors! It is the disease. Mom definitely needs to be in a Memory Care Unit. If you have time, you can tour facilities. There is a section on this site that lists facilities near you. You can also speak with her doctor for recommendations. And also ask them for an anti-anxiety med for Mom.
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