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He will blame me when he is not able to find things that he has misplaced or lost.... and it seems to be harder for him to understand instructions, and he is slightly starting to call things by a different name than what they are. He works part time, when he gets home he complains about all the other workers and is very frustrated. I’m starting to worry....

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I know of someone who started showing signs at age 50 - you need to seek professional care for him - also it could be either hard of hearing or eyes so check it out sooner than later & go yourself if he shows resistance
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I have a word of advice. First check out all possible medical issues and solutions. Second, be sure all of your affairs are in complete, perfect order and get a POA for him (try hard, you will need it soon). Third, start thinking what YOU want to do if he gets worse: Do you want to care for him at home? Do you want a caretaker? Or do you want to place him if he starts getting too difficult. Whatever you decide, do NOT let his behavior destroy your life or make you feel guilty. Think ahead. Prepare for the worst and hope for the best - and be ready to do whatever you need to do.
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Yes, I agree with the other posters...you need to get him to a doctor.  I have heard story after story about how shocked  people are when the doctor asked very direct questions like:  How old is your wife/husband? and they would say something ridiculous like 30.  Or  "what year is it?" and they would be off by 15 years.  You get into a routine with your spouse and you assume they know what they have always known and then the dr asks them a question and you are sucker punched with the fact that they are seriously ill and you didn't even know it.
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Get him to a dr. Something as simple as a UTI can cause mental confusion.
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A visit to a neurologist may be in order.
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Tell your husband that as part of your planning for the future, you feel it is time for both of you to have a good physical and emotional checkup. Look up on your computer, the signs to look for when someone is perhaps beginning to act differently and find the name of a memory care center near you where you can get some help. Know that with Alzheimers, there is no cure, no slowing down or delaying the disease. Over 21 meds have been tested in the past 11 yrs. and none of them help. You might as well give them sugar pills. I would recommend you get a copy of the 36 Hour Day, book. It will help you understand the different types of dementia, what doctors recommend, signs of neurological diseases, etc. It was a life saver for me. My husband had Alz, for 11 yrs. during which I was his care giver.
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Seems like the first thing we notice is personality changes, maybe b/c they are having a difficult time managing their brain changes. They get over whelmed easily and frustrated which turns into anger. That how it happened to my H.
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I would make an appointment with a Neurologist. If he does not want to go, tell him that you love him very much and he just has to trust you right now. Keep a note pad and write down all the changes you have seen in him. When you go for an appointment give the list to the receptionist and ask that it be given to the Dr. before he is seen.
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Schedule a doctor's appointment to find out. When you get the results, act on the suggestions quickly.
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This is my wife. She was a much loved people-person. She became mean in 2006.
Doctor's didn't know until 2014 that it was FTD Frontotemporal Dementia.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8q0V7xuz1f0
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Yes, unfortunately it is - my husband first showed signs (having trouble with new task at work, remembering driving directions) at 59 and was diagnosed with mild cognitive impairment at 60. Progressed to Alzheimer’s. Have your primary care do a mini assessment and get a referral to a neurologist. I’m sorry that you and your husband are likely on this same journey. Early on, my husband was able to enjoy socializing with friends, trips, the symphony, etc. We were able to make lots of good memories.
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Please get an evaluation by your doctor. These can be signs of dementia, stroke, infections and/or depression.

Sadly, 75% of people 75 years old or older have some form of dementia. If it is Alzheimer's disease, there are medications that will help boost the neurochemical processes if started early. They do not work forever and not on permanently damaged nerve pathways in the brain.

Whether he has dementia or not, now is a good time to establish permanent routines. The routines help to alleviate a lot of the stress in forgetfulness. Also try establishing permanent "homes" for items in the house to make it easier to find anything. You might want to streamline or downsize the amount of belongings or items that are on display to make it easier to "find" things too.
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I agree that he should be evaluated. Regardless of whether they can determine he has early dementia, sometimes called Cognitive Dysfunction at that point, there is new research that indicates there are some things that can be done to prevent, slow or reverse that decline. It is not medication; none of the approved drugs actually help. But there is some indication that dietary changes, and things like exercise can help. I am not a doctor, nor do I work for anyone who is providing this approach. I am a nurse, with a mother and both very elderly inlaws with dementia. They are too far down the path to get any help from this and because they live in facilities, I cannot really modify their diets. But for me and for my husband, I am doing a lot of reading and we are gradually changing our diets and making these other changes. It is something to consider; a somewhat alternative approach that seems to be helpful. This is not just doing puzzles and staying busy. It is a lifestyle change. I am not going to recommend any books or experts to follow; you can just google and you will find this. There is no real evidence except in some rare conditions that dementia is hereditary and I think if you live long enough, some degree of decline will happen but I am going to try to do whatever I can to avoid this in future
Good luck with your husband.
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belindaparis Sep 2019
I am a RN and read as many medical journals possible about dementia and am doing the same for myself. After my mom died from Alzheimer’s 2 years ago, I went vegetarian and do HIT exercise program 4 or 5 times a week. I deleted as much sugar ( causes inflation) as possible. I lost 15 lbs in 2 mo and have not gained it back. I also went to meditation classes- I wish I had been doing this my whole life.
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Have his Dr give him a Memory test., my own experience when my sister was showing signs @ 64 years old I got her in to see a neurologist he immediately gave her a memory test and She failed it pretty bad, apparently you can get up to a 30 on the test, and most ppl without memory issues I believe get anywhere from 25-30, my sister scored a 12, after that appt. the Dr. ordered an EEG, and a brain MRI.
Both of those tests didn't reveal much, but sure enough she has dementia
and underlying mental issues.
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Hi Vallol,
My father is older, but it was when he started to get stumped looking for a word, or substituting an incorrect word (Can I get a glass of lightbulb?) that we realized something was going on.

We discovered he was having TIAs (mini strokes). As JoAnn29 suggested, a complete physical is appropriate - and soon. High blood pressure and high cholesterol can lead to strokes. These screenings and those for some aneurysms are all covered by Medicare.

As Tetertottering suggested, you need to spend your quality time now.

Maybe the job is aggravating another condition or just stressing him out. It could be time to quit.
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My husband is showing similar worrisome signs but has enough cognition to refuse to go find out if he has beginning dementia! Think your husband is willing to be tested?
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Vallol Sep 2019
Hi katiekat, I know just what you mean, he also refuses to go get tested.... and will get irritated,if I continue to ask him. We have the same primary doctor.... if I notice changes to continue ......in confidentiality, what he can recommend.
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Thank you everyone., and Tetertottering, I do notice the symptoms more when he is under stress, I will check with our doctor.
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anonymous954216 Sep 2019
I wish you all the strength. If this is indeed your path, know that love and patience in abundance are the best supplies to stock up on! Good wishes to you both.
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Vallol, this could be a case where hubby doesn't like aging. Or hubby is doing everything the same as in the past, but since you think he might have memory issues, you are focusing more on things that probably were the norm in the past.

As we age we do start to forget some things. I just tell myself that our brain at our age, all the filing cabinets in the brain are full, thus it just takes longer to find the information we want.... and if something is misfiled in our brain, it may take a couple days to retrieve it :) Usually I will remember at midnight !!

Every year our primary doctor gives us a battery of tests, and one test is a memory test. Is that something your doctor does? If not, ask for it.
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My husband was diagnosed officially at age 55, but hindsight shows that the symptoms we chalked up to stress, commute and sleep apnea were indicators. As there is no cure yet, and no conclusive test to confirm, the time is NOW to find out about his family, to speak with doctors, take the tests and LIVE NOW. Go places, see people, take pictures. Get exercise to keep the body strong. Read everything. Educate yourself and him. But then, store all the worry and shock away. Live, laugh, share, breathe.
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Your husband should absolutely be checked by a doctor who can refer you to a specialist if anything is suspected. These signs can also signal a mini-stroke.
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I agree with JoAnn29.
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Yes, he could be showing signs at 69. He needs a good physical. At his age it would be a good idea anyway.
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