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The Pay and benefits are supposedly better than at the ccrc he works at. Most of the residents at ccrc are independent care, so as they go on there are lots of requests like there would be on a cruise ship. It’s more like a customer service job than maintenance in many ways.
Now, he’s not completely averse to that but in mc, is that requirement lifted somewhat? Or is it that he’s now gotta kowtow to ppl who after all need a locked facility?

Have any decisions been made?
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PeggySue2020 Jul 27, 2024
He’s texted the guy once. He now seems less enthusiastic about this job prospect. If there is an interview, I hope he questions freely on how much poop, pee, and lifting he’s responsible for.
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If the people your friend currently takes care of are mostly independent, he will be in for a shock if he goes over to memory care. They aren't going to pay any more than he's getting now.

Memory care is a very different place. He should stay where he is.
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How good of a friend is this person who called your guy?

I mean, there are friends and there are friends, if you get my drift. Is this someone that he trusts and has known for a long time? Have they worked at the same place together in the past? Has he been in recent contact with this person, talking about his job and his possible desire to seek employment elsewhere? Or do they talk regularly because their jobs are somewhat similar, and they can commiserate with each other? Does he believe his friend's description of this job as it's being portrayed to him?

If this call came just out of the blue, I would be curious if this friend is going to get a bonus for referring your guy should he get hired. I have seen places with incentives such as that for their employees, especially if the employer is having a hard time finding people to employ. While there's nothing wrong with that, it would give me pause to think that maybe this friend might not be totally upfront about the actual working conditions, especially if this was someone I didn't talk to on a very regular basis.

There are people who I would consider friends whose opinion about a job I would take with a huge grain of salt, and there are people whose word I would accept at face value. Where do you think this referring friend sits on a scale like that?
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The maintenance staff had it much worse in Memory Care than in AL. In MC, the residents were often soiling the carpets or chair upholstery by defecating on them. So the clean ups were not pleasant at all. The atmosphere in MC is entirely different as well......folks wandering around aimlessly or dragging around baby dolls and asking questions. The maintenance man at mom's MC was responsible for holiday decor, so he'd bring the residents small trees or statues to set up in their rooms if the families didn't come by. He'd fix tv's constantly, hunt down remotes, deal with adjustable beds, toilets, windows and broken things in general. The residents didn't ask much of him, they didn't know what was going on, basically.

In AL, the maintenance staff was busier. More like customer service, as you said, due to a load of elders needing this, that and the other thing. There's really no comparison between IL/AL and MC in terms of who your man would be dealing with and that kind of thing.

When I worked in a Memory Care Assisted Living as a front desk receptionist, the administration would allow some residents to come out to the desk area and visit (for some unknown and stupid reason). One resident drove me insane. She was relentless with her questions and her complaining, it was horrible. I had no time to myself thanks to Ursula and her continuously telling me there was nothing wrong with her at all, she was just staying there temporarily. All the OTHER residents were insane.

You need to have a certain personality type to work in MC, one unlike mine I guess. Maybe SO can do a trial run over there to get an idea for what it feels like to deal with demented elders all day long. If covid hadn't come along, I'd have quit that job tbh.
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BurntCaregiver Jul 23, 2024
@lealonnie

Funny you should mention your experience working at the AL and 'Ursula'. We had a few of them at the AL I worked for too. They thought my office was going to be the hang-out spot. Couldn't have that because I had work to do. I'm surprised the facility allowed this behavior. You were the receptionist not the activities director or the aide staff.
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Did they give him a written job description? If not, I'd ask for one to review. He shouldn't accept any excuse why they can't give it to him. Nothing in writing means they can change things at any time no matter what they said to him verbally. The compensation package should also be in writing. Then he can compare it.
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Hi PeggySue - well, doesn't he need to go thru an interview process? If so, they'd explain what the requirements are and what's expected of him, and he can ask any pertinent questions that he has. He'd also get a sense of the environment while there to see if it's something he'd be comfortable in.

I think that's the only way he'd know for sure if he should proceed or not ~
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Also I want to add to others, is there a better chance of moving up in one company or the other if he desires too.

If either one is a dead end job, with no prospects of moving up I would stay away from them.
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The real question in my opinion; how does your SO deal with sad situations?

Some people that I know CAN NOT deal with the sadness of being in a MC. The poor souls are very far gone and it is NOT for the faint hearted. The things you see, hear or smell are VERY different from an IL.

Maybe he can go spend an afternoon in the facility to see if he can deal with the altered reality of a MC unit. Because I highly doubt that he will be fielding requests from the residents and not just doing the maintenance, nothing would ever get fixed otherwise.

Somethings have no dollar value, our peace of mind is priceless and not everyone can cope with this environment. He should be very sure he can before pulling the trigger on a decision.
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Reply to Isthisrealyreal
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My man does maintenance. When he started, there would be requests for his all male department to help old people off the floor. Admin stopped that so now they call the fire department.

He brought in one of his friends who demanded and got more than him. However he, this friend, and yet another guy are actively looking around because their hospitality-backgrounded woman manager removed all but the computer chair from the facilities office. What is next, removing toilets from the staff bathroom so that men can’t sit down?

Whatever.

From ppl with experiences in mcs, is it that u are either ON with direct senior care or u are off meaning you don’t necessarily interact? We know dementia makes ppl paranoid that they’re “stealing” the remote control or whatever
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waytomisery Jul 23, 2024
Maybe his friend that works there knows what goes on .

I would assume the more confused the residents are the less interaction he would have with them . These people need routine and are usually just dealing with the nurse’s and the CNA’s . Your man wouldn’t know them , he could not know if what they say is true , he can’t know what they are permitted to have , he couldn’t do anything for them really . He will have to just tell the resident , “ Ask the nurse “ , if they ask him for something .

I think if he takes the job , the best way to not have people expect him to do things not in his lane is to keep to himself , not be overly friendly with the residents or families . Do his job , move on from one task to the next without being overly friendly. He’ll have to turn off the hospitality charm that he’s used to now.

Maybe it would be better than where he is now with Julie McCoy on The Love Boat .
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It is always scary leaving 1 job to go to another.
My Husband used to say when I would complain about my supervisor and want to switch to a different department or look for another job..."You know the devil you got"
So true you have to start all over again.

So gut reaction what is this "new place" and what is it like? Does it have a good reputation? What is the staff turnover?
How vested is he in the place where he is currently working?
Is the place he currently works hiring? If so are they paying more for new hires then current employees? (That does happen) If so he should ask for a raise and the same benefits as a new hire.

And I suppose I should ask...what does he do? If he is a CNA or Nurse the world is pretty much his oyster there are so many places looking for GOOD employees.

I will tell you that he will be doing a LOT more supervising with dementia residents than he does with a more cognizant, active community.
It can be more challenging and with challenges come rewards if you look at it that way.

Keep us posted as to what he decides to do.
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Does his now job didscription really kowtowing to people or is he just a nice guy who feels he has the time so why not.

I would ask what the job discription is. If just maintenance, more money and better benefits maybe he should take it. I don't see where he would be involved with the residents if he is not a trained side. Their needs should be carried out by the aides and family members. Might just be the right job for him.
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PeggySue2020 Jul 26, 2024
His present job description heavily mentions the customer service aspect.
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It may depend on the administration . I don’t think they are all the same .
Some are more willing to go further to keep the residents and families happy with their “ wants” . Some are more focused on their needs only , and don’t cater/indulge as much .
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