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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Your profile says that she has dementia. So, if she does and she thinks you're her sister then it probably is the dementia talking. I think I've read that the best thing to do is just go with the flow. Pretend you're her sister as there's no point in trying to correct her and you won't get her to believe that you're not her sister.
It could be but if this is the ONLY thing that you have noticed and it has been just 1 time of confusion probably not. I have looked at my grandchild and almost called them by their Uncle's name. They look so much alike at the same age it is uncanny. If you look remotely like her sister at the same age I can see how there could be some momentary confusion. Think back over the past year or so and think about all the slips that you shrugged off. And what about all the slips that you have no knowledge of? OK...now I read your profile. You say she has dementia. So her thinking that you are her sister IS the dementia. You may look like her sister or she may be at a point in her mind where you as a daughter do not exist and the only other person that you could be is her sister. As long as she feel safe with you and it does not bother you being mistaken for your aunt. Don't argue with her about it. You can remind her that your name is "Monica"
Yes, dementia will often make a person forget the face of a loved one or cause her to think you're someone else. My mother would introduce me as her mother ever since she was first diagnosed with dementia....I was her daughter. This lapse in memory with mom thinking you were her sister today will likely come and go. She may not have that confusion again ever, or it could happen again tomorrow. Dementia symptoms are not linear....they change constantly and are all over the place. Good days when she's lucid will pop up just as often as bad days when she's almost incoherent.
I suggest you read this 33 booklet which is a free download. It has THE best information ever about managing dementia and what to expect with an elder who's been diagnosed with it.
Understanding the Dementia Experience, by Jennifer Ghent-Fuller https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/210580
Jennifer is a nurse who worked for many years as an educator and counsellor for people with dementia and their families, as well as others in caring roles. She addresses the emotional and grief issues in the contexts in which they arise for families living with dementia. The reviews for her books are phenomenal b/c they are written in plain English & very easy to read/understand. Her writings have been VERY helpful for me.
The full copy of her book is available here: https://www.amazon.com/Thoughtful-Dementia-Care-Understanding-Experience/dp/B09WN439CC/ref=sr_1_2?crid=2E7WWE9X5UFXR&keywords=jennifer+ghent+fuller+books&qid=1657468364&sprefix=jennifer+ghent%2Caps%2C631&sr=8-2
Yes, play along with it. In the long run of things it doesn’t really matter. My friend’s mother “Teresa” thought my friend “Ginger” was her mother. That’s interesting because Teresa never really knew her mother, who died when she was a baby. Teresa was raised by an aunt. So when she thought Ginger was her own mother, we think Teresa identified the word “mother” with Ginger because she was Ginger’s mother and the word got mixed up in her brain so that all she knew was that the word was somehow connected to Ginger. But she no longer knew Ginger was her own daughter.
"Confusion" is one of those very general medical symptoms that can be caused by many problems:
- UTI - dehydration - vitamin deficiency - diabetes - high blood pressure - low O2 - stroke - tumor
(not a complete list).
Since the info about your 94-yr Mom you provided does not include dementia, I would take her to the doctor to at least discount a UTI, which are very common in elderly women and often have no other symptoms other than a change in cognition.
When other, treatable, issues are discounted, then she can more accurately be tested for cognition and memory impairment.
I agree with your list. We have made two serious trips to the ER and it was vitamin deficiencies, dehydration, dropped sodium and low levels of iron and several others. Surprised me and I was relieved and now I see signs quickly and we head to ER. The hospital mentioned elderly and in my moms case being a cancer survivor as well.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Good luck.
I have looked at my grandchild and almost called them by their Uncle's name. They look so much alike at the same age it is uncanny.
If you look remotely like her sister at the same age I can see how there could be some momentary confusion.
Think back over the past year or so and think about all the slips that you shrugged off. And what about all the slips that you have no knowledge of?
OK...now I read your profile.
You say she has dementia. So her thinking that you are her sister IS the dementia. You may look like her sister or she may be at a point in her mind where you as a daughter do not exist and the only other person that you could be is her sister.
As long as she feel safe with you and it does not bother you being mistaken for your aunt. Don't argue with her about it. You can remind her that your name is "Monica"
I suggest you read this 33 booklet which is a free download. It has THE best information ever about managing dementia and what to expect with an elder who's been diagnosed with it.
Understanding the Dementia Experience, by Jennifer Ghent-Fuller
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/210580
Jennifer is a nurse who worked for many years as an educator and counsellor for people with dementia and their families, as well as others in caring roles. She addresses the emotional and grief issues in the contexts in which they arise for families living with dementia. The reviews for her books are phenomenal b/c they are written in plain English & very easy to read/understand. Her writings have been VERY helpful for me.
The full copy of her book is available here:
https://www.amazon.com/Thoughtful-Dementia-Care-Understanding-Experience/dp/B09WN439CC/ref=sr_1_2?crid=2E7WWE9X5UFXR&keywords=jennifer+ghent+fuller+books&qid=1657468364&sprefix=jennifer+ghent%2Caps%2C631&sr=8-2
Best of luck to you
- UTI
- dehydration
- vitamin deficiency
- diabetes
- high blood pressure
- low O2
- stroke
- tumor
(not a complete list).
Since the info about your 94-yr Mom you provided does not include dementia, I would take her to the doctor to at least discount a UTI, which are very common in elderly women and often have no other symptoms other than a change in cognition.
When other, treatable, issues are discounted, then she can more accurately be tested for cognition and memory impairment.