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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Gather how and for what. And why would you not ask your mother this question? I would think under some circumstances it would be lovely. You use the word gather. Does this mean for a special occasion ? Siblings visiting from out of town? Thanksgiving? Holiday? Could your Mom not then join in. The home would be used which tells a while lot about what is going on with heat and plumbing. I guess what I am saying is that I cannot imagine a reason it would not be OK unless heat and water and so on have been turned off, and the furnishings covered with the proverbial sheets. Perhaps you could give us a bit more information? Do some not get along? Are some bossy or messy? Is the gathering more a move in? Would love to be more helpful, but more info would be needed.
During my mother’s years in a NH we did the arduous task of bringing her to visit her home on holidays and special occasions. She was a two person transfer and could bear zero weight. But she dearly loved a few hours back at home and that made the work well worth it. Please let us know why you see this as a bad idea in your mom’s circumstances
My mom is in Memory Care and I have brought her to my home for the afternoon for holidays, and a couple of special occasions. Did the same when she was in Assisted Living. Her place has some large gathering places you can reserve, so we might do that in the future, also a nice outside deck area in good weather.
Pre covid, I had intended to take her out more, to a play as she enjoys musicals or to mass, but she was more mobile then also, but once covid hit that was all out the window. No crowds for us. I wouldn't bring her out of town or overnight.
By six months, she should be settling in nicely. As long as she understands it's just for the day, to spend with all the family, It might be nice for her to get out.
Now if the house isn't nearby, or not in good repair, or you feel it would be too hard emotionally on her, maybe a good compromise would be to all go together rent a house for a few days for the whole family, and then it would be a neutral space that you could bring her to for the day, then take her home to AL, and bring her back another day if it goes well.
Back to her home? Is someone living there? If mom is cognizant and understands that she is in Assisted Living and that she is there for a reason. And she can not continue to live in her house. I do not see why she could not enjoy a family gathering. HOWEVER... **if mom has dementia you probably should not bring her home. (and she should be in Memory Care not AL) **if going home is unsafe for any reason for her or for the person going to care for her if she needs help you probably should not bring her home. (this would be if she is in a wheelchair, or using a walker and has to navigate stairs to get around the house. Safety issues like that)
Keep in mind that AL is not locked like MC and if mom wishes she can sign herself out for an afternoon and call a cab, UBER or take the facility van and go where she wishes.
Containing a question entirely in a title with no further details is impossible to address properly. Expand on what you're trying to say if you would like to get some useful comments.
Not sure I understand what you are asking. At first I thought you meant your siblings want to all go live in the house again. But that would be odd so I'm sure that's not what you meant.
Did anyone ask Mom's permission? Or the person(s) living there?
Once permission is obtained, who would the burden of hosting this family gathering fall to, and the clean-up, closing up and securing the house? The expense?
Many years ago, a client who was telling us about her birth history said that her mother had had to "carry her to the hospital" to give birth. Upon inquiry, this was Caribbean English for "take to".
Let's be tolerant of each other and inquire what folks mean if it's not clear. It might be "get her" or "gather" might a term in the OP's way of speaking.
One of my best friends and her sisters “gather” at their deceased parents home every Sunday for dinner. They use the term “gather” when they talk about their dinners together. If they are going to her house to get together I don’t think that’s a problem.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Perhaps you could give us a bit more information? Do some not get along? Are some bossy or messy? Is the gathering more a move in?
Would love to be more helpful, but more info would be needed.
Pre covid, I had intended to take her out more, to a play as she enjoys musicals or to mass, but she was more mobile then also, but once covid hit that was all out the window. No crowds for us.
I wouldn't bring her out of town or overnight.
By six months, she should be settling in nicely. As long as she understands it's just for the day, to spend with all the family, It might be nice for her to get out.
Now if the house isn't nearby, or not in good repair, or you feel it would be too hard emotionally on her, maybe a good compromise would be to all go together rent a house for a few days for the whole family, and then it would be a neutral space that you could bring her to for the day, then take her home to AL, and bring her back another day if it goes well.
Is someone living there?
If mom is cognizant and understands that she is in Assisted Living and that she is there for a reason. And she can not continue to live in her house. I do not see why she could not enjoy a family gathering.
HOWEVER...
**if mom has dementia you probably should not bring her home. (and she should be in Memory Care not AL)
**if going home is unsafe for any reason for her or for the person going to care for her if she needs help you probably should not bring her home. (this would be if she is in a wheelchair, or using a walker and has to navigate stairs to get around the house. Safety issues like that)
Keep in mind that AL is not locked like MC and if mom wishes she can sign herself out for an afternoon and call a cab, UBER or take the facility van and go where she wishes.
What did you mean?
Or the person(s) living there?
Once permission is obtained, who would the burden of hosting this family gathering fall to, and the clean-up, closing up and securing the house?
The expense?
That person gets the final say, imo.
Let's be tolerant of each other and inquire what folks mean if it's not clear. It might be "get her" or "gather" might a term in the OP's way of speaking.