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My mother will need help finding things when my father passes away, I live out of State who should I find to help me until I get there? She will need help locating documents and getting rid of things. Who can I hire to help until I get there?

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I asked my attorney who would manage my affairs if I'm incapable and my chosen POA predeceases me (I haven't designated an alternate POA because there isn't any family member that I consider capable, and my friends are too old). My attorney said that she would be, so we arranged it that way. I trust her, so I think she's the best choice. I live in a retirement community, and my attorney said that many people here have no one else and that she serves for them.

I'd suggest that you find a good attorney to be your boots on the ground where your parents live. You and mom will have enough to worry about as you manage your grief. My sincere condolences on your coming loss.
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Reply to Fawnby
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What kind of documents do you feel Mom will need? If Dad is still alive, its up to him to get important papers together and put them where they will easily be found. When my Mom passed, I had used her money for a prepaid funeral. The funeral home took care of everything. The Will cannot be probated until about 10 days after death, so no hurry there. Social Security is made aware of the death by the funeral home. But Mom will need to contact them about Dads SS now going to her. Its not automatic. If Dad gets a pension, those handling his pension need to be notified.

How long is it going to take you to get there that Mom needs paperwork?
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Reply to JoAnn29
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I think that you will need to plan trips there now that your parents are failing. One before Dad passes and more than one after. If there is no one there you need to know, yourself, where documents are. You probably should have BOTH parents now managed by a Licensed Fiduciary, which would make things ever so much easier when one or the other of them passes. Best of luck.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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This is a good lesson to all reading this that all important documents and their whereabouts should be shared with all trusted family members, especially a spouse, so they're not left in the dark after ones death.

I would personally just have your mother hang tight until you get there, unless you have other trusted family members nearby.
I'm sorry that you're losing your father.
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Reply to funkygrandma59
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If you are her PoA, I strongly recommend you go there and do that yourself.

For one thing, your Mom may not like or feel comfortable with a stranger doing it.

For another thing, we're talking about sensitive private information that needs to be kept private. Having a stranger do it opens her up to financial abuse and scamming.

I was PoA for my 2 elderly single and childless Aunts who lived in Southeast FL and I live in MN. I made sure to take a trip down there to find all the critical documents, scanned or took pictures of them, and submitted my PoA doc to their bank so that I could manage their account. I also set up medical and banking portals, and put all their bills on ACH or cc auto payment.

The cost of traveling and taking time off to do this (if it is a financial hardship for you) should be paid for by her.

When your Dad passes, most likely everything will go to your Mom. But when your Mom passes, it's a whole nother story. Assets may have to be probated. She will hopefully have a Last Will and assigned Executor. If there are inheritances, this needs to be distributed by the Executor but other legal hoops needs to be jumped first. Please make sure all her legal ducks are in a row before you end your visit. Consider making an appointment with a certified elder law attorney before you get there because they can be booked.

Plan for the worst, hope for the best, and just be as organized and prepared as possible to avoid big headaches later.
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Reply to Geaton777
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