Well, mom chose to go into a nursing home. I searched and found one that was nice, clean and the staff seemed genuinely nice and helpful. We requested mom start off in a private room, she has lived alone for 40+ years. Well, the administration decided they had someone they thought would be a good roommate. Well, mom’s roommate is very nice, but she has the tv on 24/7 and the lights go on and off all through the night. And mom is freezing. I find this a little strange, because I know mom has often fallen asleep with the tv on and slept for hours that way and I know she is always cold, it was 75+ in her condo and she was still cold. I told her that her body is not circulating her blood that is why she is always cold. (I was always cold as a kid and was told to put more clothes on. This doesn’t work for her. 🤪) So, she tells me she is living in hell and I have no idea what it is like. This breaks my heart. I have tried to get her to ring a nurse at night to deal with the lights/tv, she did one night. I think she lays in her bed and all she can focus on is the lights and tv. I sent eye masks, but she doesn’t like them. I have ordered ear plugs, but she probably won’t use them. She isn’t leaving the room because it is hard to get out of her wheelchair, I have suggested she ask someone to help her get out of the chair.I live 3 hours away and I am miserable. The nursing home told me it takes several weeks for residents to settle in. How do I deal with the constant lump in my throat and heavy chest? How do I hear mom without taking it personally and go straight into worry/upset mode?
Then you tell Mom you are working on getting her a private room .
You didn’t make Mom old , you can’t fix old . You have given Mom ear plugs and eye masks in the meantime . It’s up to Mom to use them . They all have the TVs loud . Too bad they don’t have lights and TVs off at night as a rule but that’s old school . They don’t do that anymore . You can’t do anymore .
But this is your mom and since they dont seem to fight for her you do. That would drive anyone crazy 24/7 TV on.
She wants a private room, get her one. (assuming she has the finances for it and is not on medicaid)