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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Attempting to control. As a sort of OCD pretender until I can upgrade to the REAL THING, I love my calendar. I mean, I can tell you how many years since Lionel died, how many years since we placed foster dog Lady Bear (and a legion of others), when I paid this bill, what I got from Amazon. This along with the usual appointments and plans. It is quite the thing. I am afraid I am destined to follow soon (I'm 82) in your loved one's footsteps.
I must tell you that one of my favorite things of my new year is the buying of the BEST CALENDAR out there, getting all the history written in, and getting it hung up on the wall.
And I will tell you how lucky you are, as well. For those of us very familiar with dementias and the sort of obsessive-compulsive swirl involved, an obsession with Calendars sounds simply WONDERFUL.
AlvaDeer, I thought I was the only one who loved buying a calendar. I have all the birthdays/anniversaries in Word, and I print out on labels, to which I cut to size to attach to the calendar.
As hubby and I get older, we rely very much on a calendar. I do find it is hard to buy a calendar that doesn't have slick paper which can get messy using a pen.
Of all the obsessions one can have(and there are many)having a calendar obsession sounds like one of the least ones to be concerned about. So count your blessings if that is all you have to concerned about with your loved one with dementia.
My 105-yr old Aunt's house had calendars in every room (sometimes 2), as well as clocks (even in the bathroom). I think it's an attempt to keep themselves oriented (my Aunt still had amazing cognition and memory up until the end) but if your LO is struggling with memory and dementia, then this may explain it. Or, as AlvaDeer pointed out, it is part of OCD behavior that can come with dementia.
The person reviewing the calendar and taking notes constantly is losing their ability to remember things. This behavior isn't so bad. Let the person have their calendar and notebooks. If they start hoarding the old calendars and notebooks that say nothing, that's when you have to take some action.
My mother is a hoarder and is now old. My cousin and I had to get her home together a bit because I was leaving and homecare was starting. We threw away a garbage can (outdoor size) full of old calendars and old junk mail dating back to the 1980's. She never allowed anyone to clean out closets or storage spaces ever. We just went ahead and did it. You can't allow hoarding. If the person is just checking one calendar all the time, let them if it makes them happy and keeps them calm.
My mom, early 90s and in ALF, is always making lists and notes. And she has a few calendars as well. Whenever I visit her, she gets her recent list out and reviews it with me. Her calendar is a major mess. One of her favorite phrases is “now let me write this down!” It used to annoy the heck out of me! I think it gives her some control and keeps her brain engaged.
My own calendar hang-up is that for the last 25 years I have bought high-quality art calendars, justifying them as a tax-deductible ‘office supply’ when we were in business farming. I like to change things so that there is something new to look at, and I already re-use my favorites. I have a spreadsheet that tells me which years start January first on the same weekday as the current year, and which start March first (to allow for leap years), and I swap calendars around. At present over my computer I have two different Turners, both ‘sunset over the sea’. Just lovely.
Of course I miss out on all the records (which are now on a computer calendar), but my family learned to accept that I always forget birthdays, and I get reminders of what is coming up.
OP, I hope all this reassures you that calendar obsessions are not confined to dementia!
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
As a sort of OCD pretender until I can upgrade to the REAL THING, I love my calendar. I mean, I can tell you how many years since Lionel died, how many years since we placed foster dog Lady Bear (and a legion of others), when I paid this bill, what I got from Amazon. This along with the usual appointments and plans. It is quite the thing. I am afraid I am destined to follow soon (I'm 82) in your loved one's footsteps.
I must tell you that one of my favorite things of my new year is the buying of the BEST CALENDAR out there, getting all the history written in, and getting it hung up on the wall.
And I will tell you how lucky you are, as well.
For those of us very familiar with dementias and the sort of obsessive-compulsive swirl involved, an obsession with Calendars sounds simply WONDERFUL.
Best out to you.
As hubby and I get older, we rely very much on a calendar. I do find it is hard to buy a calendar that doesn't have slick paper which can get messy using a pen.
So count your blessings if that is all you have to concerned about with your loved one with dementia.
My mother is a hoarder and is now old. My cousin and I had to get her home together a bit because I was leaving and homecare was starting. We threw away a garbage can (outdoor size) full of old calendars and old junk mail dating back to the 1980's. She never allowed anyone to clean out closets or storage spaces ever. We just went ahead and did it. You can't allow hoarding. If the person is just checking one calendar all the time, let them if it makes them happy and keeps them calm.
Of course I miss out on all the records (which are now on a computer calendar), but my family learned to accept that I always forget birthdays, and I get reminders of what is coming up.
OP, I hope all this reassures you that calendar obsessions are not confined to dementia!