My mother is in a private home ALF. I moved her there last year after the Drs. all said it was time. She has dementia, diabetes, and heart disease. SSA does not recognize POA so they told me to apply to be the SS payee for my mother so that I can change her address and request 1099's for her. I am trying to apply for Aid for Spouse and dependents for her. I have been told that the VA does not count her house as an asset (we are trying to clear it out then sell it) and as POA I have cashed in her last annuity. She has about $35,000 left. We are running about $1800 over her SS check every month if she does not go into the hospital. Will SSA have me account for all of the monies spent on her? Do they require an expense account report or will they? Her ALF alone is over $3000 a month. How should I prepare ahead of time if they ask? Right now I have all paid bills in folders, and carbon copies of all checks that I write. Do I need to keep track of every thing that I buy for her from the store? Clothes, drinks she likes favorite foods, and yarn for her to crochet with. I also pay out property taxes, home owners insurance, and to have yard work done on occasion from her checking account on her house which is in a Trust. She is not on Medicaid.
Here’s a link to forms used: http://www.benefits.va.gov/BENEFITS/Applying.asp
For help options, see http://www.benefits.va.gov/compensation/dbq_disabilityexams.asp. You might want to call the 1-800-827-1000 number they list to ask questions, as it appears the VA has expanded help options. I’d also look around many of the other links they provide, it will help to know some of the options and terminology when you actually reach a VA representative. I have found local VSO’s to be most helpful for in-person help, and they are free.
You are wise to keep good records. I would definitely begin keeping receipts, but you will be absolutely required to once a VA benefit begins. I use Quicken, which allows me to scan receipts from my all-in-one printer with each transaction recorded (you don't have to, but it's a nice feature). I use Quicken's "Category" feature to tag VA-allowed expenses. All other non-medical expenses (such as groceries) are not paid for by the VA. So it is very possible that eventually you will run out of money, even with VA benefits. That is where an elder planning attorney can be very helpful, as not all trusts are VA-planning trusts.
VA applications can get frustrating and bog down. You just plug along and do what each step requires and reach out for help. How lucky your mother is to have you for her advocate!
Right now I am stuck getting a 1099 from SS for last year. They can't give it to me, won't tell me what address they have on file for her, post office won't deliver mail to a vacant house although they said they would start delivering again and SS folded and put into an envelope a copy of the 1099 in front of me and told me that it went out in the mail! Aaaaahhhhh! I am in the process of becoming the "payee" on her SS account but that will take awhile. SS does not recognize POA!
I was sent a check list of all of the paperwork that is needed in order to apply for the VA benefit. I have most of the required things like death certificate, discharge papers for my dad, my mother's signature of a certain form, marriage license. I still need mom to have a physical at her doctor and have him complete another health form. I have been advised to send everything overnight mail with signature requested when received at the VA. What is a letter of intent to file for benefits, to be sent to the VA? Someone on this forum mentioned it?