I have a durable power of attorney for my mother. She fell and broke her hip and the surgery went wrong and her hip keeps coming out of socket. She spent 2 months in the hospital and they tried putting her in a nursing home. I contacted the patient advocate and got her discharged home and in home care set up for her. She had to go to the ER due to her hip disjointing for the 5th time(once at home 4 times while in hospital). The ER doctor said my POA was no good. I had to argue with him as it is legal and notorized. They admitted her, drugged her and then would not allow me to talk to her and would not give me any information about her. After 3 days I was finally told she was going into surgery 1 hr before it was to happen. I said no as she is on blood thinners for a clot in her calf. They finally listened and discharged her after a closed reduction. Her primary sent her to a specialist. However, now I am having problems with anyone communicating with me. They continually call my Mom who tells them to speak to her daughter, but instead they go around me and don't include me or notify me. I just found out there is a phone meeting scheduled between my mom, a care taker agency and the social worker. I emailed them both, left voicemails, no one is responding. My Mom has repeatedly requested they talk to me directly and she has signed releases of information and they have all been provided a copy of the POA. What do I do to get them to comply? I am frustrated and exhausted. Any advice is welcomed. Thank you
I asked to speak with the hospital administrator and they are now complying. Took a few days. We have a meeting scheduled with the patient advocate as well and her PCP has put in a referral for her to be transferred to another hospital with a hip specialist. Hoping for the best.
But to your question, we are only hearing one side, I'm wondering why they are going above you.
If it was me I'd look at myself and my actions , first and then if I really feel I did nothing to justify this , then go above them.
If I did do something to warrant this, I would ask for a meeting with her doctors, explain that maybe I did this or that, and I understand that it wasn't the right thing to do, but my emotions are on high and I will do better.
Best of luck
1-the “durable POA” mentioned above is not a healthcare POA. It’s the other kind, a “financial/general” POA. Unlikely but just have to check on this..
2-healthcare POA / healthcare proxies are pretty standard between states, and as far as I know all of them are only active during those times the principal (your mom m) lacks the power to make decisions. So even if you have a POA document, it’s not active if she has capacity to decide herself.
None of this means you shouldn’t be in the loop, etc., but I wonder if this is the case. Does your mom have her own decision making capacity? in that case, the POA would be considered not active at that moment, which could be interpreted “invalid“ through miscommunication. And would explain why they keep trying to talk to your mom about things instead of you.
Have they told you exactly WHAT about your legally done POA is not valid?
I honestly have never heard of such a thing.
Also, it is important for us to know if your mother is incompetent, as your POA doesn't pertain to a person who is competent to make her own decisions WHILE she is competent to make them.
I am sorry you and your mother is going through this. It is illegal in most states for a valid POA to be denied when a senior is incompetent in his/her own decisions. I think you need to see an attorney at once for a "lawyer letter" and a letter testamentary regarding your right to make all final legal medical decisions (again, only if your mother is legally incompetent in her own decision making).
Good luck. I hope you will update us.
Is your POA just financial? Do you have a Medical POA? As said, the POAs are two different things. How does your financial read? Immediate or you need a doctor or two to declair Mom is not able to make informed decisions?
To talk to Moms doctors, that takes a Medical POA. Usually for those to be invoked a doctor has to declair Mom incompetent. Seems these doctors feel Mom is competent and there is no need to talk to you. Just make sure your on her Hipaa forms.
HIPAA means The Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act of 1996. Which has to do with privacy.
This type of thing happens all of the time. My adult son listed me as his emergency contact, so I was getting all of his appointment reminders and doctors’ communication for six months before they finally (🤞) corrected it.
How is the durable POA not valid? Does your mother have capacity to make decisions? My mom has dementia, is incapable of making important decisions and I am authorized to make them per her durable healthcare POA. The POA is properly notarized. Her providers recognize her POA.
I am also her point of contact, for all matters. My phone number and address is her address of record
Next, I'd reach out to her primary doctor and tell them what's going on. If her hip replacement is done wrong (and it happens and there was a class-action lawsuit against the manufacturer's of one type of hip joint) take her to a different othopedic doctor.
Rehabs, hospitals, and nursing homes often overstep themselves whe it comes to patient decisions especially when it's with old people. Many times there's cash incentives offered to medical practices, social workers, and care facilities if a person gets sent to them or uses their service.
If your mother has you as her POA and tells everyone to deal with you, your POA is law. So you remember that when dealing with these people.
Also, if you're going to get homecare services for your mother and want to use an agency, use one that is indepedently and not coporate-owned. You pick, not them.
Do what everyone on this thread is saying about changing your mother's contact information. This way everyone deal with you as they should.
You might be able to hold the MD and medical institution accountable. First you need to clarify what the legal provisions are.
I would immediately report to an Umbudsman and document every communication you have (date, time, who and what). You need to have a tracking record.
Gena / Touch Matters
or maybe a legal letter to them
can you change them at all
can your mothers doctor help
They would be mortified if the local papers were updated but then woukd they reduce. Are for your mother
it’s a tough call
can legal
advice send them a scary letter?
they sound disgraceful
2. Have your mom appoint you as a Health Care Surrogate.
Here is a link to a blank one for Florida - but it could be fine in your state.
I suggest you look up "Health Care Surrogate form for
However, that doesn't account for them not taking the mother's wishes into account, as she didn't want the same surgeon operating on her, which is why she didn't want the surgery.