Desperate situation. I have three siblings, two of whom don't work, and none who do anything to help. They won't even take her out to lunch. My mother, who has end stage ms, asked my elder sister if she would wash her hair and my sister refused. She did it in a sneaky way by texting me that mom had emailed her re her hair and that I should wash it, insinuating clearly that i had dropped the ball. The final straw came yesterday, and I am so totally sickened by this that I can't even think straight. I have the flu, it started yesterday, and while I've had to endure my fathers abuse for iypt, I was just getting done what I could . My mother had diahhrea yesterday and dad took her back to bed. Today my skin is itchy and I have a fever of 101. But yesterday, my sister told me that she thinks I gave my mother laxatives in order to "back up" my "story" about being sick. I am now not just faking my illness according to her, I would also harm my mother. I can't even find a word or words to describe how disgusting she is for even thinking that, let alone saying it out loud. Please, please, does anyone know how to deal with someone like this? By the way, the family knows my temp is 101 today and not one has offered to come help even though I am certain I am contagious. I am at a loss and know that when I feel physically better I am going to have quite a bit of anger. Any advice please, this crushed me. I don't really care that she called me a faker (she is47 years old if you can believe that) because I am used to her low pathetic blows. But this latest sickens me. When I told my elderly father what shed said he did not say a word in my defense. If somebody has dealt with a family this lazy and overtly evil please I am desperate for advice. Thank you.
Anywhoo! maybe god is giving me a break??? I think mums dementia is starting to hit home to her I showed her mums meds and how she was so disorganised taking them ALSO the carer was there and said a few things to my sister about how stressful it is for me. My mums meds are blister packed mon - sun 3 tabs in morning 2 in evening yes a 3yr old could work it out. my sister (whos emotionally thick) asked the carer why mum was taking them in a disorganised way which is lethal the carer laughed and said " I think you need to educate yourself about dementia"!
I think mum is getting worse and FINALLY I think my sister is waking up to the shit ahead of us! for the first time ever she is saying she needs to be in a NH and her meds monitored? my sister for the first time got the end of mums foul mouth!!!!YIPEEEEEEE she asked mum to let me take over her meds as she was worried and mum let her have it "don't you dare start telling me what to do im not an idiot" oh yes screeched at her YIPEEEEEEE thankyou god my sister is starting to see what im putting up with.
I couldn't help myself last night though and again put one of mums smelly depends under my sis's bedcovers this morning she said she felt ill when she found it!! I said " I know its so sad god love her she just dosnt know what shes doing"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!TEE HEE HEE (hell hath no fury than a worn out messed up CARER)
I had ONE cigarette last night my sister drove me to it!
Feeling a bit better today and less stressed as my sis starting to see how nutty mum is becoming sad isn't how this can make me happy?
My sister has mum for the WHOLE WKEND yipeeeeeee she should be on crack cocaine by Monday!!!!
Heres to CARERS REVENGE! hey wouldn't that make a great movie!
I hear your desperation! You need to figure out how to make you number 1 in your life..
When sister tried turning the hair washing on you, your response should have been "she asked you" and it's time you help out!! "They are your parents too"!!
Good luck and hope the flu goes away quickly...
At xmas mum offered to make the stuffing for the turkey I said no its ok you relax ill do it. My sister threw her two cents in then by telling me if mum wants to make the stuffing then why dont you let her stop bullying her? I grabbed my sis in the kitchen in front of my brother and told her that if she wants mum to make stuffing with dirty hands maybe covered in POO basically not hygenic then go ahead thankgod my brother agreed and told her to shut up OR come home and look after her. Apart from the hygiene issues my mum cant cook anymore she burns things and dosnt know what shes doing sad but reality.
I know the utter FRUSTRATION when siblings that dont help try and tell us what to do it can drive you to madness!!
Have NOTHING to do with them if you live with your parents move out if you can help them from a distance if like me you live with them do your best by your dad ignore him not supporting you spend the last precious time with mum and screw your siblings i dont answer the phone here and my sister texts me to order me to answer the phone i tell her all sorts like im in the bath or im out mum cant hear the phone FCK my sister has just walked in the fckin door thought she was coming tomorrow. Fck and im here she said tomorrow im so angry as i couldve been out.
GOD HELP ME!
I will have a clear mind when mum dies that I did all I could to help her god help my siblings they will have to live with the guilt.
Hugs to all/ bigger hugs to all with sibling issues!
Then theres the tv shes ugly fat too thin funny looking oh I don't like him or her shes crap he has a funny nose this film is crap,this one is boring,this one is too old that was crap I don't like food anymore its crap.
Mum would you like a cup of tea and watch "hoarding buried alive" yes please oh look at the mess hes just a lazy pig!
Beam me up scotty you cannot make this woman happy! you know sometimes I think maybe its nice to go nuts say what you like when you like,pee when and where you want,eat what you want,make a mess as someones there to clean it up! don't wash sure who going to see me. don't wear teeth whod notice? fling your dirty clothes anywhere in the house and someone will pick them up. pee all over the bathroom who cares someone will clean it up!
You know maybe this being nuts isn't so bad afterall I mean we could just whatever we wanted and get away with it?
Maybe theres no such thing as dementia maybe a gang of old people got together and have this sussed so we would have to look after them while they did whatever they wanted? maybe they call each other every night and say what crap did you get away with tonight isn't this cool pretending weve got dementia and everyone does everything we ask them to do?
Yep maybe we are the nuts they seem happy enough in their little world of dictatorship!!!!
kazzaa LOL - that gave me a much needed laugh. I like your imagination. These days are a bit rough and a good laugh helps. Part of what keeps us going,
Me too, LOL. I was thinking while reading your spastic rant that we all must be the nutty ones. I'm sure that you are right about them colluding with each other to get what they want and act any way they damn please all for the purpose of making us work harder and trying to make us miserable. LOL!
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