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Father has confusion, lack of awareness; walking into neighbors house at all hours, needs more care everyday. Stepmom legally blind. I can not care for him and sadly needs Medicaid for nursing home or similiar.
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Are you POA?
Is StepMom POA? Is she competent?
Because yes, this is sounding like it will end as a court battle for guardianship, and if that is what you want I caution you that you will not be allowed to give it up if you tried to; that release must come from a judge.

Moreover, you are unlikely to get POA when there is a spouse there to take on care. That seems to be her wish?
And getting documents from an uncooperative person not worth it. Legally these fights can go to 10s of thousands of dollars.
I would step away here. I would call APS and let them handle it with stepmom. Just my personal opinion on what little I know here.
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