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have a live in aid for my mom. But my mom still calls me about 20 times a day. I have cameras so I know everything is ok. The live in aid just started five days ago. My mom says she likes the aids. they are sitting there when she calls. I thought by getting the aid this would stop. my mom has dementia. so I can talk to her hang up and she will call again saying she hasn't spoken to me. thanks again for all your help here.

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I read somewhere that it's nice if you can set up a number just for your mom where each time she calls you, she gets a message that is just for her, something like, Mom, I can't speak with you right now. I am at work, but will be thinking of you and talking to you later this week. I love you. Have a great day.

I know that with my loved one, she always worried if she couldn't get through by phone., but she understood if someone was at work and couldn't talk. That would appease her worry for awhile at least.
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Don't answer calls from your mother 20 times a day. Let the calls go to voice mail. Return her calls twice a day (or whatever seems reasonable.) You know she is safe. These calls are not emergencies.

Yes, have the aide distract Mom from making the calls if she can do so without getting Mom agitated. Otherwise let her call you and talk to voice mail. The aide can comfort her when she can't reach you. "Your daughter must be too busy to answer the phone now. But you know that she will call you after lunch."
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I tried and tried to get my sister to quit answering the phone. All she did was gripe about the number of times, Mother called her. Perhaps the aid could act like she is calling you and carry on a conversation with the dial tone. Good luck - but, please quit answering the phone.
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Is there a way you could setup a separate voice mail box so you don't need to listen to all of the messages? Just erase them all? Naturally the aids would need to have a way to contact you if need be, but only give that number to them.
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