Mom is missing meals, not taking meds right, calling dr for more meds. Cancelling upper GI which was scheduled to figure out why she isn’t eating and why she claims she is nauseous all the time. We need her to be cared for and be safe. Her home has dangerous stairs that we fear she will fall down. How do we force the move?
We are waiting on her primary to initiate the dementia diagnosis. The care givers at AL feel she has some memory issues. Meds are balanced and three meals a day are happening. Safe caring environment with others in her stage of life, lots of activities to keep her busy if she wants so we have some peace of mind she is safe. She says “I don’t care about any of those things” like she is giving up?
But how do you deal with those random calls/messages of confusion, betrayal, “why didn’t y’all discuss with me.” It’s sad! We have discussed the move, the breakdown of house, storing family heirlooms, etc many times but she isn’t remembering that.
Depression, Dementia….I’m not sure what she needs.
If your mom is not incompetent in the “legal” sense, she can change her POA. I wouldn’t encourage her to use electronics too much.
How does she know you are breaking down her home?
I don’t understand when some people (not saying you did this) manipulate, force, “make it happen” on one hand and then while the loved one is reeling, they or other “friends” feel it’s okay to share painful, devastating news.
If she has dementia it is much kinder to say, you are making needed adjustments for safety or some other phrase that she can wrap her mind around.
I feel very bad for your mother. At the same time I don’t blame you for doing what she gave you the right to do and what you feel is right. It is a tough time for you and mom right now.
If she doesn't already have a diagnosis of dementia, you will need to make sure that the symptoms she's experiencing are indeed dementia and not from something like a UTI, thyroid problems, diabetes, high blood pressure, tumor, etc. which can mimic dementia-like symptoms.
Can you tell us if your PoA is now active? This will determine the answers you get from the forum.