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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
I need a little more information to consider options for your current situation. I do know many to most people with dementia always want to be somewhere else, often a childhood home that no longer exists. It's like they think if they could only relocate then the dementia would be cured.
Who has DPOA and HCPOA? How quickly is your sister's dementia progressing? What's your plan for when she cannot stay alone while you are working? Have you been looking for adult day care options? Is your niece encouraging your sister to relocate? How does your niece plan to care for her mother as the dementia advances.
At some point, your sister will need 24/7 monitoring and will not be able to stay alone; she will need AL or MC. Maybe relocating your sister closer to her daughter and grandchildren at that time would be more appropriate.
Has her ‘boys’ or grandkids expressed an interest in having her move in with them or even being near to them? Do they work full time jobs or are the grandkids in school? If so, wouldn’t she be dealing with the same situation?
Is she capable of becoming involved in a senior community center for some companionships? Can you give us a little more information so we can answer your question better?
I empathize with your situation. I’m sorry that you are having difficulties with trying to care for mom. It’s hard not knowing what is best for her. You have taken the first step by reaching out for assistance from others. Best of luck to you.
Antimoo 1 Your sister requires more care than you are able to provide. There is no shame in that.
As POA, you are obligated to get her the care she needs, not necessarily making her happy, but honoring reasonable preferences to live near other family. This provided they are willing to step up. And be there for her when her needs increase.
If you are POA, that role can be accomplished from a distance. Many caregivers on this forum have done that for years.
How do you feel about your sister moving?
Btw, the timing may be right to sign her up for new healthcare insurance at her new address, during the open enrollment starting Oct. 15th.
To be honest, her care is her sons responsibility. They don't have to do hands on care, but need to find a facility to care for her. Was the state her sons live in where she once resided? How long has she been with you? The problem is Medicaid. It doesn't go over state lines.
Antimoo1, lots of questions to start with I'm afraid!
How long has she been living with you? Why was it decided that moving in with you was the best option? Where is the other state where the boys are living? - and are they in the same other state, or in different ones?
Your sister is 64, which means that her dementia is early onset. As she is alone at home while you are out at work, she is presumably still in the first stages of Alzheimer's Disease; but the loneliness is not good for conserving her mental function (social stimulation helps it), and you also know that eventually she will not be safe left alone. Further down the line, even if you didn't have to work and didn't especially want your own life, it would still be very difficult for one person to manage the later stages of AD single-handed.
She has ?two boys, and a grandson. Have you and she talked to them about planning her care for the future? Are there other family members too who might have help or ideas to contribute?
can she travel by herself? suggest the family as a whole who can take care of her. Maybe she misses her kids and wants to visit Grandson. Tell they boys, their mom is coming out for 2 weeks, can you handle it? She misses you.... and wants more time with grandson.
in the meantime, look for adult daycare places, places maybe she can volunteer somewhere. library has things gong on all the time. botanical gardens. voluteer at an animal shelter or school lunch programs.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Who has DPOA and HCPOA? How quickly is your sister's dementia progressing? What's your plan for when she cannot stay alone while you are working? Have you been looking for adult day care options? Is your niece encouraging your sister to relocate? How does your niece plan to care for her mother as the dementia advances.
At some point, your sister will need 24/7 monitoring and will not be able to stay alone; she will need AL or MC. Maybe relocating your sister closer to her daughter and grandchildren at that time would be more appropriate.
Is she capable of becoming involved in a senior community center for some companionships? Can you give us a little more information so we can answer your question better?
I empathize with your situation. I’m sorry that you are having difficulties with trying to care for mom. It’s hard not knowing what is best for her. You have taken the first step by reaching out for assistance from others. Best of luck to you.
Your sister requires more care than you are able to provide. There is no shame in that.
As POA, you are obligated to get her the care she needs, not necessarily making her happy, but honoring reasonable preferences to live near other family. This provided they are willing to step up. And be there for her when her needs increase.
If you are POA, that role can be accomplished from a distance. Many caregivers on this forum have done that for years.
How do you feel about your sister moving?
Btw, the timing may be right to sign her up for new healthcare insurance at her new address, during the open enrollment starting Oct. 15th.
How long has she been living with you?
Why was it decided that moving in with you was the best option?
Where is the other state where the boys are living? - and are they in the same other state, or in different ones?
Your sister is 64, which means that her dementia is early onset. As she is alone at home while you are out at work, she is presumably still in the first stages of Alzheimer's Disease; but the loneliness is not good for conserving her mental function (social stimulation helps it), and you also know that eventually she will not be safe left alone. Further down the line, even if you didn't have to work and didn't especially want your own life, it would still be very difficult for one person to manage the later stages of AD single-handed.
She has ?two boys, and a grandson. Have you and she talked to them about planning her care for the future? Are there other family members too who might have help or ideas to contribute?
in the meantime, look for adult daycare places, places maybe she can volunteer somewhere. library has things gong on all the time. botanical gardens. voluteer at an animal shelter or school lunch programs.