Mom had whole brain radiation 5 years ago. I feel she has developed vascular dementia. I’m not sure what is going on. In April, she was dropped by her aide and fractured her tibia in 3 places. She was placed in a rehab facility, but has never come home due to “cognitive decline.”
No no one can seem to tell me what’s going on with her but did suggest I get hospice involved. So I did. As far as I know she isn't terminal unless they know something I don’t.
Most days mom is up in her wheelchair but very disengaged. Some days I can tell she is confused and speech is hard. She will start a sentence and can not finish. She swallows her meds and regular diet food but will pocket at times. Yesterday, I noticed she was holding saliva in her mouth refusing to swallow it. No food or pills, just spit. She also will take her index finger and tap things, like her food and coffee or her blankets. She doesn’t seem to remember how to use utensils and will pick up her food, like a baked potato, rice, steamed carrots, with her hands.
She knows who I am. And seems aware of her surroundings but won’t hold a conversation with me. Which may be frustration with finding her words? I can’t tell. Although, yesterday she couldn’t talk due to all the saliva she wasn’t swallowing.
Anyone experience this? I just want to know what’s going on and why would they want hospice called in? I have asked both the staff and hospice but I always get the standard, “It’s for comfort care and pain management”
(she suffers from neurogenic pain in her legs).
mom wont go to a neurologist. I tried. As her POA I could just do it but I am trying to respect her wants. This was stated by her before she declined.
What could be happening to your Mom is what is called "failure to thrive". My own Mom was going down hill fairly quickly and not improving at all. Mom was able to talk and once in awhile would make sense, other times not. She couldn't feed or dress herself.
I thought my Mom knew who I was, as she would say my name when she saw me [her eyesight was to a point of being almost blind]. Then later I noticed she was calling her Aides by my name.
My Mom also had pain, it was her back, as she was now a meer 85 lbs and laying in bed was so painful for her. The facility tried a wheelchair but my Mom's brain was telling her she could stand and walk, when she could no longer do so. Lot of falling on her part.
Then the long-term-care facility called my Dad and I into a meeting. Time for Hospice. This was the first time I ever heard that term, and the literature Hospice gave me sounded like the right fit. And I was right. They were an extra set of eyes and ears for my Mom. And a month later her passing was so very peaceful.