Management sent out a letter telling everyone that it's against company policy to give caregivers individual gifts at holiday time. I get that, but they recommend instead giving money that will be pooled together anonymously to provide holiday bonuses to all hourly employees. Then they suggested a "donation" amount that's quite a lot of money! And since it will be anonymous and include staff people who don't even know my husband, it seems to kind of defeat the purpose of a personal recognition for those who take best hands-on care of him, to let them know how much our family appreciates their work.
This happens at Christmas. Well, yes, it amounts to 365 days and $365 for a gift at year end to our 1) housekeeper (1x a week); cooks, servers, cleaners of dining room staff-daily; janitors, maintenance workers, and office staff. If I had to pay a housekeeper weekly, I would be paying her more than $365 per year. That said, $1.00 per day for ALL staff people who provide our care is worth it financially, and get to be fair to all employees. Figure this, an employee who cleans all corners of my apartment, another doing my laundry, another cleaning my carpet 1 x a year, cutting the grass outside my apartment, all that would be more than $365 a year, or $1.00 a day for 365 days. And it wouldn't be kind to a great worker whose "customers" cannot afford to give her/him a better gift of money, but for the next worker who does little, like maybe fix a broken window one time a year, gets a tip too. So the $1.00 a day works well for us here--that's for ALL STAFF who help us, not just for 1 person who helps us. My donation this year amounted to $365 plus I included more for a total of $500. Great service.
This is all spread evenly over all employees, so all get the same amount, including maintenance, painters, housekeepers, but not caregivers. They are paid separately, as if they were a nurse or doctor. If you say "I can't afford $365 for Christmas". Figure could you put a $1.00 in a hat every day at the end of a 3 meal day? Most of us could do that. Doesn't that add up to $365? Most of us CAN AFFORD $1.00 a day. Especially if you smoke, or stop in the little shop on campus for a candy bar or two several days a week. Be kind to them, and they will be kind to you. And I know myself and several others, contributed a lot more than $365.00 to the Christmas employee gift fund, because we got good service from great staff.
From the guy that is up at 3am shoveling, salting the walkways, the receptionist that answers the phone, the dishwasher in the kitchen, and on and on.
If you can not afford to give the amount that is suggested, give what you can. And if you are able to bring in a basket of fruit one morning, bring in something else in the afternoon so that both AM and PM shifts can share what you bring. (I mention fruits, something other than candy, cookies and the like because simply because it is nice to take a break from all the sweets. (That said I would select a cookie over an orange!)
If there are staff members that you feel do an exceptional job PLEASE write them a note telling them how much you appreciate what they do and the care that they take. Make a copy and send it to their supervisor or HR so that they have a copy. It might help if this person wants a raise, better hours or the choice of a day off.
Maybe this is naive thinking. I don't know what's happening in the real world around holiday gift-giving.
I'd say just hand them a holiday card. You don't have to tell them there's a gift card inside. It's a token of appreciation, which is what is meant... from you, to them.
A for-profit business suggesting contributions to a pooled anonymous distribution is a new one by me. I have to agree it defeats the purpose of wanting to give to those people one interacts with and very much appreciates during the holidays.
It's not that those folks behind the scenes are lesser; only they aren't the ones you interact with. Can't it be more personal..?
Give a tip or gift when your husband's days with them come to an end.
I spent many years working in hospitals. Tips were not and are not allowed, period! Patients/residents pay the institution for their care and are all entitled to the best the institution can give. Deficiencies, if present, are to be brought to the Facility Administration for attention.
This is as it should be.
I lived for awhile in one of the biggest, most highly rated (independent, dependent and memory care) facilities in the country. It is, in fact, on the US Stock Exchange!
They begin in June to "collect" funds from residents for the annual Employee Christmas Party. A minimum amount is suggested per resident, but everyone is urged to pay more if possible. Certain residents are put in charge of collections and keep track of every donation and who it is from. "Why all the record keeping?", I asked. I was told that donors would need a record for their INCOME TAX! Hey, I'm no accountant, but I know that only government registered bonifide charities qualify for this deduction.
I had no complaint about the living conditions, but eventually left because I was uncomfortable with the repeated requests for donations.
That is the only fair way to do it. Not just cnas, but every receptionist, cook, waitstaff, maintenance, janitorial, driver is involved in providing customer service. The better they collectively do, the bigger their bonus check.
Also some residents who "appear competent" and are technically legally still competent will give things away that they shouldn't. My dad was giving his favorite caregiver some of my things. My In-Laws were giving away cash that they couldn't afford to gift when they were in AL. Best to have rules to protect everyone. Also then employees can't be accused of stealing or taking things inappropriately.
Another ethical consideration: I'd respond to such a 'suggested' amount to 'donate' with a few written questions before writing a check: How precisely, in detail, are the residents' families' donations going to be divided among the paid hourly employees who actually interact with our loved ones? I don't want it going to the facility manager or anyone at the corporate level at the facility [who, in our case, never knew our names or even made eye contact with us when we came to visit our mom]! And I wouldn't write a check until I received exact answers to those questions.
It’s very unethical for this MC to ask clients to provide money that they are going to use as “bonuses” for their employees which I’m sure the MC will present to the employees as though they are the ones giving their employees these bonuses and they are not going to tell the employees the truth that the money came from the clients. Meanwhile, the MC is making a profit and instead of passing some of those profits as bonuses onto its employees, it’s just going to pocket their profits. This is a rip off.
I would secretly go against their policy and give gifts to employees that helped your LO. If you are going to give money, just place it in an envelope and secretly give it to your LO’s caregiver.
At Easter I took a very large box of pick-a-mix from the Russell Stover candy store. All individually wrapped pieces and a huge variety for all tastes.
Best way I've found to try to give something back to the staff at my mom's place. They also have a no tipping rule and request that those who want, donate towards their staff party, all funds to be used for raffle prizes (gift cards).
All of us have worked in places where some of us hustled while others didn’t work nearly as hard. I would have hated sharing my tips.
I made tons more money than some of my coworkers because regular customers would request to sit in my section.
I welcomed large groups, birthday parties and the like. Some of the other waitresses were lazy and didn’t want to serve large groups so they didn’t make as much money.
When my daughters waited tables in college they hated sharing their tips. My youngest daughter switched from waiting tables to bartending in college to avoid dealing with shared tips. She made a lot more tips tending bar with less work!
I wouldn’t give money to be pooled if I were you. I would give an individual gift to those that I chose to. That is what I did when my dad was in rehab during Christmas after his stroke.
I did make a donation to the hospice care home that my mom was in. They had to cancel their major fundraiser due to Covid.
It cost a fortune to live in managed care. It's not a hotel. You don't have to grease the porter who carries the luggage or the maid who cleans your room and brings the clean towels.
I often ask people of they think they tip their doctor? Or their auto mechanic. Or the cashier who checks them out at the grocery store.
I was a supervisor at a high-end AL. The supervisors and administrator had a meeting to decide your actual question. They took my suggestion that small gifts (not over $20) could be given to staff members of choice by residents and their families.
There were a lot of boxes of chocolates and wine.
The facility your husband is in is going to pool the money collected and give a percentage of it to the hourly employees after they take their cut. I wouldn't give to that if I were you.
If there are particular aides that take good care of your husband take care of them on the down-low.
No one owes anyone a tip or anything else. If a person wants to give a gift or a tip to an individual who they like or who takes care of their LO directly they should. They do not owe everyone else.
As for pooling tips. That is total BS. I did restaurant as my second job for a long time. I refused to work in a place that pooled tips. If I'm busting my backside hustling on a busy night, it's me earning that money not everyone else. It's the diners I was taking care of leaving ME that money, not all the other waitstaff.
I let my employees accept gifts from clients and their family this time of year. Nothing over $100 though.
I would give what you can afford to the general fund.
And I don't know that a card with a Starbucks card for a few cups of coffee would be caught for an individual.
My daughter, a teacher, drinks free coffee a good portion of the year from Christmas cards!
I always accepting gifts on the down-low when I was agency and facility employed.
No one ever really gets in trouble unless some employee brags to another then they get snitched on to the boss.
PS - if you hand out cards to everyone and only include the tip for your chosen few it will be even more discreet.