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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
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VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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For one her kids go home. My big kid is 24/7 365 days a yr. No weekends off no holidays no vacation. Second, the kids she cares for grows more independent where my kid grows more dependent on me. But she still says its the same. HELP me.
Let's talk diapers- Child- Refusal to have diaper changed-pick child up and put on changing table. Clean with wipe, place one diaper under bottom, attach tapes. done. Return child to playpen and give favorite toy.
Demented elder- Refusal to have diaper changed- pleading by you for 10 minutes, then distraction, finally in bathroom. Won't sit on toilet. Fight ensues to remove diaper. More pleading and explaining. Finally on toilet. Puts hand into poopy diaper before you can roll it up. Now cleaning hand and using nail brush. Back to elimination-"Why don't you go pee while we're here?" "I don't have to." You clean privates and get a clean diaper. When LO stands up, pee comes down. Aaahhhhh!!!. Sit LO down on toilet again (mumbling under your breath, "I thought you said you didn't have to pee!) Wipe privates again with wipes, apply NEW diaper, assist with standing and tuck shirt into pants-"NOOO, I don't want my shirt tucked into my pants!!!" Pull shirt out with a bit more force than necessary. Turn to assist in washing hands at sink. "NOOOO, the water is too cold." Wait 30 seconds for water to heat up. "NOOO, my rings will fall off." Take rings off and put in a secure place. Pump soap into hands, "NOOO, that's too much soap!!!" Make sure no more poopies under nails, "Aaaahhhhhh that nail brush is KILLING me!!!" Rinse hands, get towel. "NOOO, they're still wet!!" Dry hands thoroughly. Return LO to sofa and assist in sitting down. Place pillow behind back, then....."I have to go to the bathroom." Explain (why?) that she just went-to no avail. Go to garage-scream your lungs out-return. Pour 4 ozs. of whatever wine is available because....it's 5 o'clock somewhere!!!!!
That's the difference. 😜
This scenario was taken from an actual caregiving day with my mom. Kids are sooooo much easier. 👼🏼
Well, one example comes to mind, and I know there are many. If a young child tumbles over onto the rug, do we call 911 or go over a pick the child up? Of course, we are able to pick the child up.
If an elder tumbles over onto the rug, chances are we cannot lift up the person by ourselves thus a call to 911. This could happen on a regular basis.
This is a common comparison from those on the outside, I even heard it from mom's doctor. There ARE a few commonalities, but each has unique challenges and though both are caregiving they are not the same at all. Do you have a good relationship with her, would it be worth the time to try to educate her, or not? If not you can explain until you are blue in the face, but if she wants to belittle your efforts nothing you say will ever matter, she won't want to hear it.
edit - 4 hours Barb? I'm afraid that might only reinforce her beliefs, asking for a weekend while you take a break might get through to her.
She or he is just an idiot.Don't bother to explain waste of time.Who knows carma is b.just watch what will happen to her or him....My brother told me over the telephone that taking care of my mother of 63 years old with dementia is the same as taking care of his children!I said I have to go and put the phone down.
Go have said family member go change her diaper and have them get back to you. After my brother watched me change grandma's diaper for the first time, he said it was 10 times worse than changing the diaper on his 2 year old.
Tell her you'll gladly trade for a week and THEN see if she still feels the same way. I don't know whether to feel sorry for her ignorance and stupidity or be mad as hell that a grown woman can't distinguish the difference. Obviously she's sorely lacking in the social graces of what to say and when.
Let it go. There's no reasoning with the undereducated.
I think the comment was made out of ignorance from someone who has never had to care for an aging parent before. Try to shake it off and realize that this person just can't understand the difference until she's experienced caring for an elderly person. I understand your frustration with the comment but she obviously doesn't know any better.
Oh Sue....I'm still laughing! Thanks for making me laugh. I also smile everytime I see a post from needtowashhair. Because I LOVE the name lol! Serious subject sure. But laughs are good too!
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Child-
Refusal to have diaper changed-pick child up and put on changing table. Clean with wipe, place one diaper under bottom, attach tapes. done. Return child to playpen and give favorite toy.
Demented elder-
Refusal to have diaper changed- pleading by you for 10 minutes, then distraction, finally in bathroom. Won't sit on toilet. Fight ensues to remove diaper. More pleading and explaining. Finally on toilet. Puts hand into poopy diaper before you can roll it up. Now cleaning hand and using nail brush. Back to elimination-"Why don't you go pee while we're here?" "I don't have to." You clean privates and get a clean diaper. When LO stands up, pee comes down. Aaahhhhh!!!. Sit LO down on toilet again (mumbling under your breath, "I thought you said you didn't have to pee!) Wipe privates again with wipes, apply NEW diaper, assist with standing and tuck shirt into pants-"NOOO, I don't want my shirt tucked into my pants!!!" Pull shirt out with a bit more force than necessary. Turn to assist in washing hands at sink. "NOOOO, the water is too cold." Wait 30 seconds for water to heat up. "NOOO, my rings will fall off." Take rings off and put in a secure place. Pump soap into hands, "NOOO, that's too much soap!!!" Make sure no more poopies under nails, "Aaaahhhhhh that nail brush is KILLING me!!!" Rinse hands, get towel. "NOOO, they're still wet!!"
Dry hands thoroughly. Return LO to sofa and assist in sitting down. Place pillow behind back, then....."I have to go to the bathroom." Explain (why?) that she just went-to no avail.
Go to garage-scream your lungs out-return. Pour 4 ozs. of whatever wine is available because....it's 5 o'clock somewhere!!!!!
That's the difference. 😜
This scenario was taken from an actual caregiving day with my mom.
Kids are sooooo much easier. 👼🏼
Frankly, I would just laugh gently at someone so pitifully stupid.
If an elder tumbles over onto the rug, chances are we cannot lift up the person by ourselves thus a call to 911. This could happen on a regular basis.
edit - 4 hours Barb? I'm afraid that might only reinforce her beliefs, asking for a weekend while you take a break might get through to her.
See if that person would trade you places/jobs for just one day. Nothing like feet on the ground.
I don't know whether to feel sorry for her ignorance and stupidity or be mad as hell that a grown woman can't distinguish the difference.
Obviously she's sorely lacking in the social graces of what to say and when.
Let it go. There's no reasoning with the undereducated.
You could show her these posts. 😄
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