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Hi all,


I have not posted in a while. Recap: Dad has history of falls, just got out of round 2 of extended rehab for trouble walking/general mobility/stroke suspected. He and Mom live in an apartment but I feel they need a cheaper one or go to Assisted Living. They are subsisting on Social Security alone so if AL, it will need to be a Medicaid-funded facility. Mom's health isn't great so part of me says that if she goes first, Dad will end up in a nursing home, so solo apartment is a no-go. I'm an only child (age 50) and my head is swimming. Has anyone used HUD Housing Counselors or any other housing counselors to work through this mess to determine options? Or should I start with the local social services? I've called several senior low-income apartment facilities but the waiting lists are 2-3 years. Thanks for any advice on where to start teasing out this issue.

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I live in Salem County and the ALs here do not except Medicaid unless you have at least paid privately for two years. Moms cost for her alone was almost 5k a month and that was getting her in with a discount on room and board. The more help she needed the more she paid. Even if Mom/Dad could do this, the AL may hit the % they allow for Medicaid residents so Mom and Dad couldn't stay. The 2 yr thing maybe a Medicaid thing, too.

Not many choices in S Jersey. Unless you get on Medicaid for a LTC everything else is expensive. Have you tried Medicaid for Homecare services? They would get an aide for a few hours a day.

You are right in saying that HUD apartments have 2 yr waiting lists. But that helps in that they have a little more money but still need help health wise.
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Also check with the Area Agency on Aging. They will visit the folks to determine the level of care needed. They also know of any services that are available to them based on their situation.

That elder law attorney should be on your folks dime not yours. Are all the documents in place? Power of Attorney, will, etc?
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New Jersey has some pretty solid programs available for seniors but neither Medicare nor Medicaid will pay for a AL. Some have Medicaid waivers but usually after your parents have self paid (out of pocket) for two or so years some AL will keep the patient if they still fit the criteria for that level of care.

My mother lived in Ocean County NJ. My mother qualified for state PADD (prescription assistance program).

I can say NJ has many senior resources but you have to know about the programs to benefit from them. Your local Dept of Aging can help.

As far as senior housing, in New Jersey (as with most states I assume) a senior with minimal assets can apply for rent assistance but has to prove financial hardship. My mom and brother live in one. They go through recert from the state annually. During this annual recert the covered parties must provide receipts, etc to qualify. It was easy for them as they are close to being poor. Since my mother passed my brother retained the HUD apartment and gets a rent voucher in his name. But yes the waiting list can be long.
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If your parents are also in NJ, keep in mind that there are 2 Medicaid programs that help pay for assisted living but there is likely a waitlist for them. The good news is that your state does have other state programs for elder needing AL or LTC so there are going to be options for you. Good luck!
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SZHNJ1023 Mar 2019
They are in NJ. Thanks for the info!
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Don't know what state you are in but in New York neither Medicare or Medicaid pay for Assisted Living, only Nursing Homes. They wouldn't be any better off in a low income independent apartment than they are now. Sounds like they need to be somewhere that provides care and services. Since there is no money, more than likely it would have to be a nursing home.

Rather than HUD, I would contact your county Senior Services agency and give them the details. They should be able to help you in finding the right place for your parents. I would also begin the Medicaid application process. Don't know what your finances are, but if you are able to hire an elder attorney to help you navigate this process it could be very helpful to you.

You are in a tough situation but help is available. You are not alone, you've found this site and people do care. Please let us know how you make out.
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SZHNJ1023 Mar 2019
Good suggestions, thank you. I think you’re right that hiring an atty to navigate is a good idea. It’s going to be tight for me financially but getting it done right is important.
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