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Seems like it's mom or dad. I am the one who is looking for suggestions on how to proceed because I am alone. I have no one to apologize to because I am old and in need of help myself.

Hi Irish,
Yeah, for sure. I am 82, and partner is 84. As Margaret says, there are some on Forum even older.
I think care is something that is so dependent on so many things.
How mentally able you are.
How physically able you are.
And whether or not you have help of family nearby.
For myself and partner, his own girls have crumped long before we have, meaning they have more problems currently in their 60s than we do in our 80s, and cannot help in future, nor would we want them to.
My own are not living nearby, nor would I want my child to take on my care.
So, as you say......essentially alone.

So the only planning you really can do begins when young to have worked so hard, been so lucky in timing, and clipped so many coupons that you have choices.
For us the choice will be when/if for extended care facilities.
My partner had a huge stroke in Oct. Because we got him to one of the best stroke centers in the country within minutes the clot busters busted the thing and he came back 100% almost at once. As a nurse I had NEVER seen that happen once in a career. So he was lucky that time. But at our age we know we are sitting ducks for one thing or another.

Do you have specific concerns right this minute.
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Irish eyes (smiling, I hope), there are plenty of regular posters here who are elderly and coping themselves with some of the trials of aging. I am 77, Alva is over 80, Elizabeth is over 85, and there are others. Clearly the oldest of us are still able to think, write and post, but that doesn’t mean we are ‘well’, or without physical problems. As Alva has said, aging is not for the faint-hearted! The one thing us oldies don’t have to cope with is us being unreasonable and complaining at ourselves!

Please could you post again about your own situation, and the suggestions you are looking for.

Welcome to the site! If you could say whether you know your way around all the information on the site, I’ll explain if you want. Yours, Margaret
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