Replacing the much lamented 'On My Mind' profile option, this thread is for musings, jottings, whimsies, preoccupations and the rest of the thesaurus for anyone to jot down anything they please.
I can't remember what the maximum character count was before, can anyone else? But anyway it wasn't very many so let's keep to that.
I am so obsessed right now, with coloring. I just ordered a New Orleans coloring book, that will be fun! 😊
💖💖
Yup the denial I’ve seen the past two days is astounding . I told DH , they will find partner ( who isn’t eating much) on the floor at home .
Take care of yourself and DH. 🫂💖
Partner's family are also in denial. I'm glad the bill paying went well. They need to smell the coffee and they probably will eventually. Mil can't babysit their dad anymore. Yes, memory care is expensive. Maybe they haven't made any back up plans. Not your problem as such but can cause problems for you I am sure.
Hope Dh detaches and doesn't worry about mil's foolishness. Trouble is he has had too much of that sort of thing to deal with, with his dad. I'm sure it's a sensitive area for him. Hope all the legalities are panning out reasonably.
Prayers for all.
Well ,partners family is still holding out hope that MIL has some miraculous recovery and comes home so she can supervise again . We did see partner and family as we had to meet up to settle up paying household bills , which went well . They are not realizing how bad partner is , they also mentioned how expensive memory care is .
MIL is so bad she may not even make it to AL , she may skip ( not literally ) right into SNF . She waited too long . We begged her to go to AL 6 months ago . She apparently has some bad bedsores and her pelvic , sacral , and spinal compression fractures have her immobile . She says she has walked alittle in PT . We watched the aide transfer her . She is dead weight until he gets her to stand .
Assisted living came and did assessment yesterday . MIL will have to have her wounds healed and be able to stand and pivot . If she can’t , to SNF she goes .
They said at least 3 more week in rehab .
Meanwhile we walked in on MIL on the phone with her friend talking about lunch outing plans next month when friend from Florida comes up north for the summer. I don’t think so .
DH is having his moments of frustration with MIL during our visit .At times she is talking about unrealistic plans for when she leaves rehab of partying with her friends at her condo and driving again . It’s strangely alike to FIL 3 years ago . At one point I sent DH out for coffee/tea for us .
While we were waiting in the hallway , another patient was brought back to her room across the hall . I could hear the staff member saying “ Here is your remote , your call bell etc.”. Then the staff member was moving her overbed table near her and said something along the lines that she would straighten it up .
The patient ( a female ) said “ Don’t worry about it . My son is coming , my daughter-in-law will clean it up “. 🤦♀️🤦♀️🤦♀️
Wishing you luck.
I hope things work out really well.
Let us know. Thinking of you.
Namely:
There’s someone in my life I miss. I’m going to reach out to them. Let’s see if this solves 99% of my problems. Maybe even 100%.
here’s some luck 🍀🍀🍀
and a huggggg 🌈🌈🌈
things can get very hard sometimes. hang in there. sometimes solutions pop up unexpectedly.
🙂🙂🙂
bundle of joy
Eva - thinking of you too. I know things are tough for you and Dh . (((((hugs))))
On the other side, I just had a phone call from a friend of many years who lives in a small town about 3 hrs south of us. She has just moved into an assisted living and is very happy there. Her husband of about 15 years (second marriage for both, each lost a spouse) had his 95th birthday a week ago. He will not move though he has heart and mobility problems. She is a few years younger than I am but has mobility problems (uses a walker) and I believe has had some heart problems.
She is as happy as a clam! I asked if she had friends there and she said about 10 more than she figured so she is very well off in that department!!! She has a small living room with kitchen off it and a small bedroom and bathroom. Her only concern is how far she is from the dining room (due to her mobility). She makes her own breakfast and eats the other meals in the dining room with her friends. there are lots of activities. The staff are very kind and helpful. The cost is prorated to your income.
Both her kids and I have been encouraging her to go ahead and move despite her husband's decision to stay, as she was having such trouble getting around. I suspect she will be in a wheel chair before too long. I also suspect her hub will eventually follow as his health declines. He is a collector of stuff (not a hoarder yet anyway) and I think that is part of what keeps him in his house. He likes his hobbies but is less and less able to do them. In any case, she is now in the right place for her. We have talked about this over the years and I am very happy for her.
I totally understand that he does not want to be her POA. It's all such a mess and she is unpredictable. It's a huge commitment.
It's all a bit late for her to be concerned now, but maybe it will motivate her to take some sensible steps. It's been extremely frustrating for you and Dh to try to help her protect herself and her assets and have her disregard your advice.
(((((hugs)))) and prayers for a path through all this
Meanwhile take a little break when you can - treat yourself/yourselves to something you enjoy. Go out for a nice meal and don't talk about it, go to a movie or even just watch one together on TV with popcorn. Life goes on despite Mil's messes.
I would like him to step back , but he’s in FOG from relatives .
The problem may be if he signs POA, and MIL , becomes uncooperative again…..
we frequently say/read on this Forum to give up POA. I recently learned from my nephew who looked into it that it’s next to impossible in my state anyway . He said he would pretty much have to be in a coma . Idk about NY where MIL lives .
But I agree , MIL made her bed…. She did not untangle herself financially from her partner, or at least have some proper legal papers drawn up regarding what happens if one needs to pay for care . It’s a mess and may need to go to court to force the house to be sold to pay for her care .
We begged her for years to get advice from an eldercare attorney . MIL is acting surprised that this is happening . Meanwhile NOW she’s worried that partner ( with advanced Alzheimer’s ) may burn the house down . 🙄🙄
This is the only reason he is trying to clean up the mess MIL has made. He really does not want to be her POA.
Im just having a hard time being patient with stupid lately. 😂
Good news, R's PSA is good after two bouts of ADT. He will get checked again in 6 months.
Way and Psue - thinking of both of you and so so glad I am no longer in that role. So, so glad.
Daisy - I'm a bit irritable today too. Maybe we need winter to be over. I know I'm tired from the appliance changes and am having to watch my mouth and not succeeding 100%.
Peasuep & waytomisery, how's things going?
On my mind- I've become, quite mouthy, to people. I yelled at a friends bf yesterday when he started preaching about the evils of the vaccine. I told him he has his views I have mine, but he wouldn't stop! I just went nuts , thinking back on it , I just can't believe it was me it's just after 5 years of this dam controversy I'm so sick of it. Like this is getting so darn old people. Let's just respect each other's views, and shut UP. I told him all that while he just stared at me.
Then on the 🚢 I told a guy he is a masginistic jerk and walked away.
My mouth is going to get me in trouble one of this days.
Stove not to be plugged in for an hour - fridge two hours. Never heard that for a stove before.