My husband of 7 1/2 years has been very difficult. He has gaslighted me for at least 6 1/2 years very stubborn, passive aggressive is having lots of problems starting to walk and we do not have the funds to be able to put him into assisted living he will have to go through the state, but where I live in Oregon it seems like the state wants to take everything And put it in one lump sum and then go from there. Is there a solution to this problem or am I just in the bad situation I thought of getting divorced but I am not sure that that’s gonna work because it’s not 10 years and therefore, I still need to have his Social Security or my part in order to be able to afford to live in a house with a roof over my head , we don’t have a lot of equity. We’re in a lovely mfg home right now, but we need to buy less expensive and that way it would be available and affordable for me if we he passes on before I do. Any suggestions.
You are currently married for 6 1/2 years and only ONE YEAR was minimally happy.
The divorce attorney will help guide you in division of assets.
Basically you will leave with your own Social Security and your own one half of the assets IF any of those assets are your own earnings. If you entered into the marriage to live with your husband in HIS home, then really your only assets are what you came to the marriage with, and your Social Security, but the attorney can inform you more clearly exactly what they are.
You may only be able to afford a room somewhere, but that's better than living unhappily with someone. As to his care, his family should help with management of that; if not a call to the APS to report him as a senior in need upon your exit is crucial.
I think it would be best for you to invest in a consultation with an elder law attorney, an estate planner and/or a Medicaid Planner for your home state. We're not financial advisors and I'm sure there are more details and variables in your situation that would be important to know for planning.
I do think that sticking it out to the 10 year mark for his SS may be a good idea, if you can do it.
Please talk to a professional who will give you more accurate and customed advise to you.