My mother’s husband recently died. But before this, he had alienated her from her family. I’m an only child and it is a blessing to be reunited with her and a blessing she remembers me despite the trauma she lived through with this controlling narcissist, who basically held her captive in an RV and took her away for four years. He made a “friend” her durable and medical POA. This friend did get my mom into a memory care facility. But she has not shown me copies of any documents and will not return my calls or texts. The facility Mom is in said the POA is blocking my ability to see her medical records, know what meds she is on, and I have no ability to confer with her doctors. She painted a bleak picture of my mom’s condition and was not forthcoming with information. Thank God a cousin lives near the hospital where they took my mom after husband was found dead. Cousin went there (because I live 400 miles away) to find out Mom was being discharged that day, and I wouldn’t have known. I got to FaceTime with Mom and she remembered me. She looked great. Tearful reunion. She forgets things but not what’s in her heart. Question is: Since her family (me, my son, mom’s brother and a bunch of cousins) all love her and are competent people, why do we need this woman? If she had any decency she would step down as POA. Will a court grant me guardianship easily? Thing is, I need to be in charge of my own mom, not this woman who is carrying out mom’s dead husband’s evil vendetta to separate us forever, still controlling things from the grave for no good reason.
My siblings & I met with mom's court appointed attorney, who was absolutely wonderful with mom & us. The Temporary Emergency application was a very smooth process. The application for permanent Guardianship was not difficult either, time consuming with paperwork & doctor letters, but not difficult in any way. We actually did it all with just advice from an attorney friend up until about a week before the final court date when a couple of siblings decided to contest bc they wanted mom to remain in a facility instead of coming home. We did hire an attorney at that point bc we promised mom we'd get her home come hell or high water (we had her home at this point).
Try the Temporary Emergency application. I hope everything goes well for your mom & you. I'm glad you found her. What a sweet reunion. Sending prayers you get her home with you & her family where she belongs! Bless you for trying to do this for your mom.
I would consult with an elder law attorney who will give you options and give you costs.
If you are living in the same area or nearby you may wish first to consult with APS and tell them this entire story as you told it to us, and ask for options. They may intervene and get you temporary guardianship if you can prove your case with witnesses, and they may suggest, as I just did, that you consult an attorney.
I wish you the best of luck.
If your Mom still has legal capacity (which is a low bar), then the current PoA is not active. Unless your Mom's PoA was durable (ie it was active immediately, without a diagnosis of impairment) then this will definitely require an attorney.
You may be able to get an attorney to write a letter demanding the PoA show her documents to a judge. If this PoA can't or won't do this, then you may have some leverage, AND it may turn out that this person really isn't the PoA, just is acting as such. However, most hospitals and facilities will insist on seeing the paperwork (I just went through this myself).
You may be able to prove that your Mom was coerced to sign the PoA document because of the abusive relationship. I wish you all the best as you work to reunite with her.
You need a lawyer. This is a forum of caregivers from all over the US and other countries. We cannot give you legal advice. A lawyer may be able to ask for proof of POA. If its found that this person's POA is legit, then guardianship is the only way to go and its expensive. Unless, Mom is capable of assigning you which will revoke the other POA.