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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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My mother has started being extremely nasty and belligerent with in home caregivers. Within 30 minutes she says that she doesn’t remember. Do we “chastise” her?
Yeah....chastising them just makes them double-down and get nastier/more belligerent, in my experience. (I learned the hard way.) Trained caregivers should have lots of experience dealing with this, though, and sometimes have little tricks up their sleeves to work around the behaviour. It's usually harder on the family members.
If the behaviour is upsetting the caregivers, you may need to find someone with more experience with dementia patients.
I think this stage is heartbreaking! (And frustrating. And stressful.)
Do these outbursts happen in a pattern? Are they worse at certain times of day? With certain people? Under certain conditions, such as not getting her way, or not being understood? I wonder if there are triggers you could minimize.
Is she taking anything for generalized anxiety?
Teepa Snow has several videos on youtube where she deals with calming dementia patients who are belligerent or out of control.
Usually when going into a hospital with routine blood work a UTI will be tested for. I’m not sure about frequency in a NH. But anytime there is a sudden change of behavior, an escalation of dementia type symptoms it is a good idea to check for one. Some people have them often. Some can hardly get rid of them. They can be toxic.
97yroldmom: How often do they test for UTI'S in the hospital or nursing home? I'm new to this because my mom is just getting diagnosed in the Severe stage.
My mother gets that way when she feels like she's being pushed around ... she wants her own way and she wants OUT ... so she screeches instead of talking normally, threatens to kick people, etc. She was like that today when I went to visit her at her memory care. So I took her OUT ... to the rose garden, where we sat in the sun, watched the fountain, and listened to the birds. Then we went inside and she got involved with eating lunch. You, or caregiver, have to be calm, give the person as much of what she wants as makes sense (the smallest things help), do what calms her. I've found that it seldom helps to "chastise," when my mother is in her I Want My Way mode ... and there is definitely no purpose in trying to chastise after she's forgotten.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
If the behaviour is upsetting the caregivers, you may need to find someone with more experience with dementia patients.
Do these outbursts happen in a pattern? Are they worse at certain times of day? With certain people? Under certain conditions, such as not getting her way, or not being understood? I wonder if there are triggers you could minimize.
Is she taking anything for generalized anxiety?
Teepa Snow has several videos on youtube where she deals with calming dementia patients who are belligerent or out of control.
Chastising her may
1) relieve some of your tension and discomfort
2) make you feel guilty later
3) upset her more
4) not do a darn thing to change future behavior.