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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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My mother can't care for him at home - he's weak, not mobile...and twice her height and weight. If we can't talk him in to rehab, do we have any options?
My feeling is this if someone refuses to go to rehab. They should be allowed to come home but ONLY if there are no mental issues. By coming home, a caretaker could be available 24/7 or for a few hours so the caretaker could carry on with his/her life. But mental issues - no, then the patient must be put in a safe place.
Kristin, what happened with your father? I suspect that what happened is that your father ended up going home, and that you are helping your mother take care of him?
Grandma1954 is correct in my understanding. The fastest way to get a loved one into a nursing home is when they're at the hospital to tell the hospital that there is no one to take care of them especially if they are a danger to themselves or to someone else or have lost the ability to make decisions for or care for themselves. Nursing homes are in great demand because when your parents live to be at that age, usually their children are also up in age and being a caretaker has been proven to really take a toll on your health so there is no way your mother would probably be able to do it. And if your dad is fighting against rehab this is just the beginning of what he will fight against especially if he feels like he's losing freedom or control over his life.
Kristinr, my Mom was in rehab due to a serious fall. Rehab was trying to get Mom to walk/stand, but sadly her head injury caused too much confusion, and at 98 there would be very little healing process.
Mom needed a much higher level of care than what my Dad [also in this 90's] could provide. So we opts for Mom to live in the long-term-care section of the Rehab facility. It was self-pay. Thank goodness my parents saved for all these "rainy days" as it was storming out there.
If finances are an issue, see if your Dad could be accepted by Medicaid, which will pay for his care. But frist one would need to check if the long-term-care or nursing home accepts Medicaid.
Another reason we had my Mom live at long-term-care, it would have been heartsick for my Dad to see Mom in that condition day after day, 24/7. When he visited her, he could only stay a half hour, he would be so upset.
Kristinr, tell Dad if he doesn't go to Rehab, then he would lose his health insurance... sometimes we need to tell a therapeutic lie to get elderly to do what is in the best interest.
If the person at home can not care for the person being released the hospital can not nor will not release the patient to home. They do not want re-admissions and if the patient can not be cared for or would be in danger at home other placement has to be found. All your Mother has to do is say she can not care for him.
Does your dad have dementia? Is he likely to be found incompetent by two doctors, or is he simply selfish and making poor choices?
You need to protect mom.
You can tell dad that there will be no one home to care for him, since you're taking mom on a cruise.
Make sure that discharge office knows that dad will be returning to an empty house, since you have no intention of catering to his ill advised plan. If they insist that they are discharging him home, ask for them to put in writing that they know that they are discharging a vulnerable elder into an unsafe hime environment.
The deal is dad doesn't get to say "no, I won't go (to rehab)." His patient advocate (more than likely you) will have to place him there- not in his home where no one is a medical professional.
Was the dialysis for an acute condition that will resolve or does he need maintenance dialysis 3x/week going forward? If so and he consents he will need to go to an out patient dialysis center. But before that, there are some rehab centers that provide dialysis on site. Talk with his doctors to find out which he will need on hospital discharge. There are social workers and discharge coordinators in the hospital that will help you plan his care. The rehab will provide dialysis until he recovers somewhat and gets his strength back, even if it takes a month or two. Good luck to you.
Thank you for the kind words. We are going back to the hospital tomorrow to talk to the doctors again. We are hoping they will talk to him along with us. So far he says no. I'm afraid we will have to look in to guardianship...
Sorry to hear what is happening with your dad. Can the hospital staff help your family talk to your dad about his options. Can they offer home care? Advice on hiring a caregiver for your dad? Or have your dad talk to a social worker? I hope you can find the right options and care for your dad and mom.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
(I hope this is NOT what happened.)
Mom needed a much higher level of care than what my Dad [also in this 90's] could provide. So we opts for Mom to live in the long-term-care section of the Rehab facility. It was self-pay. Thank goodness my parents saved for all these "rainy days" as it was storming out there.
If finances are an issue, see if your Dad could be accepted by Medicaid, which will pay for his care. But frist one would need to check if the long-term-care or nursing home accepts Medicaid.
Another reason we had my Mom live at long-term-care, it would have been heartsick for my Dad to see Mom in that condition day after day, 24/7. When he visited her, he could only stay a half hour, he would be so upset.
Kristinr, tell Dad if he doesn't go to Rehab, then he would lose his health insurance... sometimes we need to tell a therapeutic lie to get elderly to do what is in the best interest.
All your Mother has to do is say she can not care for him.
When something bad happens, I have to deal with it
so I'm the Captain now.
You need to protect mom.
You can tell dad that there will be no one home to care for him, since you're taking mom on a cruise.
Make sure that discharge office knows that dad will be returning to an empty house, since you have no intention of catering to his ill advised plan. If they insist that they are discharging him home, ask for them to put in writing that they know that they are discharging a vulnerable elder into an unsafe hime environment.
Sorry to hear what is happening with your dad. Can the hospital staff help your family talk to your dad about his options. Can they offer home care? Advice on hiring a caregiver for your dad? Or have your dad talk to a social worker? I hope you can find the right options and care for your dad and mom.