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hi all, we have compiled an extensive list list of AL/MC facilities for my father. A lot of these places make it really hard to get pricing information. When i call them they want all my information for them to just tell me its out of our price range. We have until the 21st of this month to select and begin the admission process for our father and the homes are making it hard for us to select what area to drive to and take tours, because they take their sweet time on the phone asking me 21 questions it feels like... id like to know if you guys have some sort of script or tips i could use to make these places cut to the chase. we are doing private pay. thanks all

They cannot give you exact amounts. The AL Mom was in had 3 different size rooms and apts, all different pricing. Then its Dads care needs. He will need to be evaluated by the Nurse and the price of his care will depend on his needs. Moms AL had 4 levels and she was #4. They can give you approximate totals but not exact.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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Pick three places and go in person. They will give you a tour and a packet with information.
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Reply to lkdrymom
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Do they have websites you can check out?
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Reply to cover9339
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Geaton777 Jan 6, 2025
Facilites do not publish their fees on their websites. This is for 2 reasons:

- the reality of the cost will stop people cold and they'll never go there for an in-person visit (where the real sales job happens)

- prices fluctuate and they'd need to pay their website admin to do the updating
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When I did my search in 2 different states, I personally went to the places to get "a feel" for the place. I was handed a packet with pricing. Just remember that this is for the room. Additional costs are determined with the interview.

One thing that I found, if going for the lowest cost, the next round of price increases might just become higher than your second choice. Expect increases every year as your lived one deteriorates over time.
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Reply to MACinCT
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I know it's frustrating not to just get a set answer. Facilities are required by law to certify that they can provide appropriate care for the resident's needs, so they do need information. Even on the same floor with neighboring rooms, there can be add-on costs for medication management, incontinence care and supplies, things like tracking blood sugar or blood pressure, if the patient is wheelchair-bound or can't feed themselve so needs assistance, etc. They structure the prices differently, regarding what's included and what's added on. Alva has a good suggestion for how to approach the issue.
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Reply to MG8522
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You know, they are a business. They have spent time and research to find out what works best in selling you something. What do you imagine you could possibly do to counter that? Very little really.
I think, too, that you must remember that much of cost has to do with the individual who is entering care. Care costs go by levels. Learn all you can about levels of care so you can speak intelligently with them, and then simply do your best.
Tell them:
"I am sorry if this sounds rude; I know you have your model for discussion of your facility all set us. But what I need FIRST is to know base rate on one or two rooms, and what each level of care costs". THEN I will set up tours and discuss things more thoroughly."

Worth a try. But do know, they may or may not accept YOU and your loved one. That depends on what type of care they qualify for. It doesn't pay them to tell you rates for a level one, quite competent and self caring senior who is on their feet and has no issues with continence, memory, wandering, and etc. when what you may be presenting is a person who honestly needs MC and much help and supervision.

This is the nature of the beast. Do the best you can. Be honest.

To be perfectly honest with you this is a huge decision. You want to tour and you want to hear what pay raises to expect yearly, what the levels of care consist of and cost, and what reasons would lead them to tell you they cannot care for your elder. You want to taste the food, tour, see the facilities and know what they offer.
I would advise you to TAKE THE TIME.
For my brother, when going into ALF care there were things that made a great deal of difference in how we were treated on tours, with information, with what we saw, whether food or grounds were the most important, and etc. We learned so much.

So, I would advise just to take all the time you can with this important decision.
Last line a funny one:
My brother and I understood they would take an interest in his assets and whether he could afford their care.
Finally, we came to describing him as "about a million on the hoof". I think none of them had farmers in their family; few found it funny.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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I agree, the best way is to go there in person and ask for a packet (usually has the floor layout options, pricing, other essential info).

Please also consider faith-based facilities. In my experience they are more affordable and your LO does not need to share the same faith, or any faith at all. They see the care as a mission. My MIL was in a wonderful facility for 7 years and got excellent care. It was run by Presbyterian Homes (they do national fundraising to help offset the cost of the care). I will be going there myself, if necessary!
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Reply to Geaton777
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Go down there in person and find out. You need to do that anyway, because I'm sure you'd never place your father in an AL sight unseen. It's also helpful to speak to the residents who live there, because the admissions director will insist they serve cherry Coke in the water fountains.

Pick a few in the same general area and stump the pavement, it's the only way.
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Reply to lealonnie1
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