My mom wont get out of bed because she is afraid to fall. We have a trainer to help her get out of bed she chases them away. My mom lays down all the time and crys because her body is hurting and I am losing sleep. When people tell her to sit up and eat and drink She refuses. So she ask for a cigarette i tell her no because she is on antibiotics and she gets mad at me when i cook for her she tells me to hurry up. I get annoyed when she calls me and wake me up in the morning.and everytime I try to change her she tells me no. I dont want her to stink and be dirty. My mom thinks I'm trying telling her what to do she says I dont have to do nothing. All she do is lie down this is not good its not her. So I don't know what else to do my brother tries to help her she wont listen hes mad about it. My other siblings are no help so I don't know what to do. I don't want to be around her that much any more because she emotionally abuse me and I dont want to put her in the nursing home unless her Demenita is bad. I want to help her but she is giving up on life and dont care no more. All your answers will be great. Thank you .
Your Mom could also be angry that at her age she can no longer do the things she like. I know for myself, I'm your Mom's age, I have noticed age decline. Gone are the days of doing yard work. We have aches and pains in the morning. Our hearing isn't as clear and our eyesight no longer 20/20. Some folks can sail through aging, but others find it down right difficult. The later could be your Mom.
There comes a time when we need to back off on enabling our parents to continue their current lifestyle. Of course your Mom won't get out of bed, she needs a reason to do so.... such as getting up and walking to the kitchen to have her meals. Try asking Mom for "her" help, such as laundry. If the laundry doesn't get done, just keep asking her to help you.
Same with other chores. Ask her silly questions about cooking and cleaning, and if she gets into a snit, you can smile knowing she took the bait. And hopefully Mom will start to feel like she is needed.
Whether any of these suggestions will work, only time will tell. Hope this situation gets better for both of you.
Has she been tested for a urinary tract infection? These can cause behavioral issues in elderly folks.
I think you should get mom to a hospital ER to find out why she is in so much pain. Tell the hospital she can no longer be cared for safely at home ( stress the safety part) so that they send her to rehab after the hospital.