If my mother is in Palliative Care, why is she still in so much pain? How do I get her more relief, if possible?
My mother has been added to Palliative Care. My understanding is that they are to ease her pain as much as possible. At home she was put on Tylenol with Codeine 3. When I finally had to put her in a nursing home because I could no longer lift her due to messing up my rotator cuff, she was in more pain. I asked if she was being given her TC3. They had no order whatsoever. She is now getting it three times a day. Mom is still in intense pain. It doesn't help that she is full of arthritis. She had neck and back surgery several years ago and it didn't seem to help much. Her surgeon said there was no other surgery that would help. I have never talked to a doctor nor have I ever seen one at the nursing facility. Granted I am limited on the trips I am able to make, so I can't fault the NH for that yet. To whom do I talk with to see if there is more that can be medically done. She is at the point that they get her up for two hours in the morning and she is in bed the rest of the time because she cannot sit up without pain. Mom does sleep a lot and I can understand that. She also stays very cold and wears a long sleeved shirt and a diaper. Sometimes if they know I'm going to show up she'll have pants on, but when they take them off to clean her the pants go into the laundry basket and she is just covered up after having a new diaper put on.There is no patient advocate; only a social worker. The social worker doesn't have the time nor makes the effort to answer my requests for advice. She makes me feel like I'm disrupting her day. I want my mother to have the best possible care for what time she has left, but there are so many residents per wing and very few capable aides who care enough to go that extra step.I'm asking for sound advice. If you are only going to attack me then please do not respond. I don't want it nor do I need it. Thank you.
I will say that because your mom is in the bed most of the day, it is much easier to provide care without dealing with pulling pants up and down. Moving her to do this likely increases her pain, but of course they should be keeping her warm with plenty of blankets.
My daughter has worked NHs for over 20 yrs as an LPN and an RN and she says no one is told who is Medicaid and who is private pay. All residents are treated the same. Yes, staff may figure it out but its cruel and abusive to leave a person in pain like this.
We are a Forum of strangers without any power here, and as you recognize in your note above, this is a medical issue. Palliative care, you are correct, is USUALLY much better about addressing pain. Arrange a discussion with Mom's doctor if you are her POA or responsible party.
Tell the doctor what you have told us.
Do update us after you speak with responsible parties. I wish you the very best of luck.
Is she on Medicaid and this is why there's a social worker involved? Are you her PoA? I'm only asking these questions to see where any power/authority resides in order to suggest solutions.
The part about leaving her without pants because it is easier would have me furious! When my mom's dementia was advanced they asked me to buy modified clothing that was designed for wheelchair users, like this
https://www.silverts.com/ca/shop-by-need/wheelchair/women