Or should I hold back some things? I feel sick at the thought of my first therapy appointment. Worried that I'll start rambling on like a lunatic, or start crying & not be able to stop. (Obvious that I've waited too long to get help?) I rarely trust anyone with how I feel, cuz that's how I ended up with that dam# lexapro (last month). Please answer before Friday (Nov 16) when I have the appt. Thanks.
I went to 3 different doctors spread out over a span of 3 months on the days where I felt like I really could not function anymore. Only ONE of them really listened, really comforted me, really gave me solid solutions to consider, and really made me feel like hey--this sort of emotional distress is NORMAL. And that there is nothing wrong with ME to feel like this. He also told me that I could come back to him anytime I needed. It really made me feel so much better.
As for the other two doctors... I felt like they could not understand the situation AT ALL and as a result I felt like I had to "keep myself in order" in front of them and not "waste their time." Which should NOT be the case when we are a PATIENT. At my lowest, with one of the unsympathetic doctors I clammed up entirely and thought to myself "if I went out of this place now and threw myself in front of a car, you wouldn't even care, would you?"
My advice to you is that you should feel free to pour your heart out. A good therapist shouldn't be making you feel like you are being judged. Neither should you feel like you have to hold yourself back because of THEM. If they do make you feel that way, or in any way that gives you discomfort, CHANGE your therapist immediately. Nobody should make you feel worse when you are already at your lowest, especially not when they are supposed to be there to help us with our emotional distress.
Another thing I would suggest, is to perhaps write down your thoughts first before going to your therapist. And bring it along. So if it makes you really nervous to speak to the therapist directly, you could then ask if you could just read from your letter? And be honest with your therapist that you are terrified about your first experience--hopefully then, they will know how to be extra gentle with you.
I believe I read this somewhere on this forum: for self care, we should get our care and support from those who can give it to us, and not keep on trying to get it from those who cannot give it to us. Be it for family, friends, or the therapist of our choice, I think the same golden logic applies.
Good luck!!
Dont worry about it. Your therapist will kind of lead you with questions .. or mine did. You shouldn't hold back.. and be truthful about how you feel.. it might feel good to get that off your chest... if you cry .. you cry.. I have cried many times in my sessions..
But only talk about you are comfortable with as of now. You will warm up to him/her in your own time and she/he will know this. Take one session at a time.
You can and probably need this. You will be fine! This is a great step in the right direction.
I think advice here is good to maybe start small, and let the therapist guide you. I assume you will get a pretty good feeling whether you are comfortable sharing more with this person. Trust your instincts. I hope you find healing through this process.
I have RARELY dealt with a poor therapist, but I left two when I felt we had completed all the work I needed to do.
I would LOVE to be able to cry in a therapy session. In fact, the next time I go, I may ask my therapist to help me figure out why it’s so difficult for me to do so.
Thank You for the helpful suggestion, Tiger55.