I looked at the one very close to my house and am concerned that there might be too many people that are way worse than my mom to make MC a good option for her. It has a great reputation but I wonder if I should lobby for her to be in a regular LTC room instead of MC. She is on the waiting list but should be coming to the top in the next few months. Or sooner? Who knows. She is not a flight risk and does not have any bad behaviors like violence or anything. She is currently in LTC but I really want her at the nicer facility near me. She is currently a level 5. I saw lots of people that are a 7 that are out of it in special reclining type wheelchairs. Kinda heartbreaking!
If she had an issue with a resident, the staff always resolved it for her, I must say. There was a man named Denny who'd knock on moms locked door all the time, which made her anxious beyond belief. Staff wound up placing a big club chair in front of her door so he couldn't navigate his wheelchair close enough to touch her door anymore.
Memory Care is a difficult environment, especially for difficult or complaining individuals who expect silence and normal behavior 100% of the time, like my mother. There isn't too much "normal behavior" in a group of elders suffering varying degrees of dementia, I'll tell you that. So my suggestion is to wait as long as humanly possible to place your mom in the MC. It's a last resort, honestly. My mom went in about a year too soon, imo. She became wheelchair bound at the same time her dementia had taken a nosedive. Plus she was falling a LOT and often required 2 people to assist her in regular AL. So after she went to the hospital and rehab, she was rejected for readmittance to AL. I could've tried getting her placed in a different AL, but the move to MC within the same place she'd lived at for 5 yrs seemed more prudent. She was 92 at the time and lived to 95.
There is no good answer when dementia is in the house. It's a lose lose situation for all concerned and no matter WHAT we do, we tend to feel it's the wrong decision. It isn't.....its the disease that's the problem, not the tough decisions we're faced with.
Best of luck to you, my friend.
I am afraid the only answer I see is for EXCELLENT facilities to come up with the "inbetween" care and that's rare as hen's teeth.
Will they ever be created in any number?
Only when they are money-makers; because honestly that's the American model.
My brother was at Pacifica Senior Living in Palm Springs 5 years ago. I cannot say enough good about this facility. They had at that campus cottages. There was one larger cottage that was a locked memory care. The other cottages had approximately 14 rooms each around a common area divided in front with a common room for TV, visiting, and dining in read. Tube room and office for staff, small kitchen for snacks in the middle. These cottages were, in Assisted Living, open to coming and going with only a sign in and sign out. The corner rooms were two room apartments; other rooms all a single room. At the point that my brother died they were just beginning to come to the concept of a "middle" choice for care which was that one cottage was locked, better staffed, and for those who are beyond ALF but not yet needing MC.
This would be, I think, IDEAL for your dear mom. She may need level four care, but she isn't a good fit for those with more advanced dementia.
I don't know what will this or any other country has for making things "good" for the aged. The truth is, when you look at the support provided them and their caregivers, this and any other country for the "most part" don't seem to have the will or want to invest the money. Sad, that. We see "Village Models". We know they WORK. But we know the cost and we aren't willing.
I can only wish you luck. Do speak with the admins there. My very best to you.
I can understand wanting to move your Mom into something nicer. If your Mom gets to the top of the waiting list, please note that anyone who has memory issues, moving can be very stressful. New building to learn her way around, new faces of Staff and residents, new sounds/smells, and different food.
Try to set up her bedroom the say way her bedroom is now set up at LTC. That way if she awakes in the middle of the night, the room won't feel strange. I did that for my Dad and it helped. My Dad loved the sunshine, so I was able to get him a south facing room :)