Over the past few months, my husband, who has dementia, has several times said things to me like “we should show this to my wife,” or “let’s tell Ann about this” (I’m the wife in question). Also, in a recent stay in a rehab hospital after a TIA, he told the help that his wife’s name was Helen (don’t know who that is). Most of the time, he fully realizes that I’m his wife and knows my name. I am wondering if this signifies a new phase of worsening dementia or if it’s just a blip. It kind of freaks me out. (He’s 83 and has suffered from dementia for at least 6 years.) Wonder if others have similar experiences or can recognize what is going on. Thank you.
Yes. It may not be all the time. My mom would not recognize me as her daughter, thought I was her sister, often. Often did not recognize her husband and wanted him to leave.
Hang on, it is likely to get worse.
We would be in the store and he would start to follow someone. I figured by the look of the person he may have thought it was me in my 20's (long brown hair)
sometimes he would follow someone with gray hair and a bit more heavy set and I figured he was thinking it was me in my 40's. I had gotten my hair cut and stopped coloring it and I was just waiting for the time he would follow a gray haired old man! that never happened...
We were also in the store one day and he got a panic look on his face and I asked him what was wrong and he said he had to find his wife. I told him I would walk with him until we found her. I left my cart of things and as we walked out toward the car I unlocked the door, and he walker right up the car, put his walker aside and opened the door.
As I explain all this the only time he spoke was the one time he said he was looking for his wife. Other than that he was pretty much non verbal. Probably had not put more than 2 sentences together in 6 years. If he spoke it would be 1 word.
What you can do..
Let it go.
do not try to convince him you are his wife.
Sometimes if you leave the room then come back into the room that might "reset" his recollection. You could try saying.."You are right, Ann would like this let me go get her" Leave the room then come back and see what happens.
But I would figure that this is another phase, another part of his decline.