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My husband was diagnosed with Parkinson’s 3 years ago. He became incapable of doing things and supper slowly. However he becomes perfectly fine when doing things he likes. I think he may take advantage of his condition and take advantage of me. Is Parkinson’s patient capable of caring for others feeling?

You can disable people. Meaning, you do something for them that they can do for themselves, maybe slower, but tgey can do for themselves.

Is your iome handicapped excessable? Bars in the tub/shower. A shower chair with a hand held shower head. Maybe a commode over the toilet to make it easier to get up and down. Can he be alone for some time so you can get out. If so, hide a few cameras to see what hebis doing when your not home. If you are not getting a thank you, don't do it.

A classmate had parkinsons for over 20 yrs. He passed at the age of 70. He was active for most of that time. Your husband may end up with Dementia. Since he shows you jo appreciation, at that point I would place him.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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I had a Grand Mother and Cousin with Parkinsons and its a cruel disease .
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Reply to KNance72
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It is advised for people with Parkinson’s to do as much as possible. Why? Because even simple accomplishments increase happiness. People lose dopamine and I don’t think pills replace it effectively. So hobbies, walks, exercise and doing all that he is capable of doing is for his own good.
My husband has Parkinson’s was diagnosed in 2015 but years before GP suspected it. Until late 2020 he was fine, just took few pills, we enjoyed extensive travels, socialized, he did exercise a lot and did almost all household chores.
I do believe living normal lifestyle and ignoring that disease (although we were not in denial) helped as we concentrated on good living. Maybe it was his adventurer personality and mine as well that despite knowing about this disease and no cure we faced it and moved on.
Now he is late stage with unbelievable pain and hospitalization after hospitalization with nothing being
found , all that can be done is controlling pain with morphine.
He was always grateful, now he losses empathy I think it is more due to pain.
I strongly believe in living normal life as long as possible. It is cruel disease and sooner or later he will progress faster. Perhaps he is depressed because of it?
Most people don’t have dementia until late stage, my husband does not have it but about 70% by last stage experience that.
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Reply to Evamar
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Could be the disease and could just be your hubby's general personality?
We would be the last to be able to guess; your own guess would be the best guess.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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I feel this sickness finally gave him a perfect excuse not to do anything he doesn’t like and free ticket to be completely selfish. How do I prove my theory is right or wrong? Ask doctors?
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Reply to Cindy888
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lealonnie1 Dec 29, 2024
You're not going to be able to "prove" something like that Cindy, and besides, what's the point? PD is a progressive disease that worsens with time. Things won't get better with him, only worse. Depression/anxiety often go along with PD, so perhaps thats something to talk to his doctor about.

Decide what YOU want to do and go from there.
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He may have the onset of dementia. Among many other things, dementia robs our LOs of their ability to empathize with others, even those closest to them. It can also be responsible for a behavior called Showtiming, where they can briefly (and seemingly willfully) operate at a higher level of function, temporarily.

I'm so sorry for this situation. I respectfully encourage you to research about dementia, and even Lewy Body dementia (which often accompanies Parkinsons but can have different symptoms). May you receive peace in your heart on this journey.
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Reply to Geaton777
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Many folks with PD also develop dementia. If that happens, they become self absorbed and unable to feel empathy for others. Are you seeing signs of cognitive decline in your husband?

In any event, hire an aide to be with him if necessary and get out of the house. Have lunch with friends, see a movie and go shopping. Don't devote your entire life to a man who's unappreciative of your efforts. Even if he thanked you profusely, you still need time for yourself. Burn out is real.

Best of luck to you.
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