I sleep on the couch next to his bed and I heard a loud thump this morning about 3:30, I got up and found him lying on the floor. He is so determined that he must get to the toilet to pee. His actions pulled the cathater right out of him - balloon still inflated. I had to call 911 to get him up of the floor. Got him settled, Nurse came and put in cathater and he has had all his meds including those that relax him in addition to the morphine. Now he is fighting again to get up. He does not recognize where we are. He is begging me to help him to the toilet. IT IS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. I weight 135 lbs and he is a solid 200 lbs. Reason I had to call 911. It took two men to get him into bed lifting him. He now feels I don't love him because I won't help him to toilet.
He slept all night until he woke up at 3:30 on the floor. I just think the drugs are too low for his weight. I don;t know what to do. Weekend nurses are for emergencies only. She did come and put new cathater in. There are no Medical aids that are employed to work weekends with this hospice. That upsets me and I will be talking to them about this. With all this fighting to get out of bed, the bed is forever having to be remade. And, that in itself is hard work with his weight. I want him at home, not a nursing home. He sleeps all day and fights all night.
I am afraid the truth is that some hospices simply do not have the money to be able to provide the aid you need. I believe you live in a fairly remote area and not for profit hospitals rely heavily on outside contributions to keep going and I suspect you are in a poor rural area. Ask about increasing the anti anxiety medications to see if that quietens him and he sleeps most of the time. The very dark urine either means that he is dehydrated or that his liver is failing. Not a close sign of death but the time is getting short. Make certain he is not in pain. If he wants to eat let him but limit it to soups and things like jello and ice cream just in tiny spoonsful so he does not choke.
When you do get him up the bed wrap a pillow in a long sheet and put it against the soles of his feet and tuck the ends in as hard as you can under the mattress. Also raise the center of the bed a little under his knees. Is there anyone who can come and stay with you for a few weeks just for support. You only need to fall and hurt yourself and there will be no one to help him so do what is best not what is ideal if you can't
When your partner sleeps during the day, is he in bed or sleeping sitting up in a recliner/sofa? If yes, I found that if someone has physical pain that laying down in bed can be a real bear, depending on where the pain is located.