Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
✔
I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
✔
I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
he took out a reverse mortgage with out my knowledge, we live in TX a community property state, i was not 62 at the time (found all this out after he passed) why did they not check?
Tree, please come back and tell us how this all works out. We learn from others. These RMs sound so good on TV. They make it sound like its free money when its not. Its a loan that has to be paid back.
I see that your question isn't, "What should I do now" but rather, "Why didn't they check?"
The answer is "Who knows why they didn't check?"
Maybe ask, "Why didn't my husband put my name on the mortgage? Why didn't my husband tell me about the RM? Why did my husband tell a lie that would screw me over from beyond the grave?"
Again, "Who knows?"
But you now have to move through this very distressing problem.
If you have to sell the house to pay off the RM, you won't wind up with a house no matter what. Consider letting it go into foreclosure and then walk away to begin a fresh start.
I wish you clarity, wisdom and peace in your heart that you cannot change what has transpired but that you can still have a worthwhile future.
They checked the things they were required by law to check. THEY aren't the bad guys here. Hubby is. Being dead it's too late to do anything about them. There is now a loan that has come due. Attorneys were consulted. It is (sadly) over. ALL the sympathy in the world with this poor gal. She chose the wrong man. But it is done, and she can't change it. She can hate the RM company all she likes, and she can hate hubby as well. That just won't change the loan that's come due. And hatred will eat the liver....so.....
I did a search on your situation. AI returned this info along with more.
File a Complaint: You can file a complaint with the Texas Department of Insurance and the Federal Housing Finance Agency (FHFA). Seek Legal Advice: Consult with an attorney specializing in reverse mortgages and consumer protection to understand your rights and options. Key Considerations: Honesty is Essential: It's crucial to be truthful and transparent with lenders about your marital status and other relevant information. Due Diligence: Lenders should conduct thorough due diligence to verify the information provided by borrowers.
Treetree, your husband may have signed an affidavit stating that he wasn't married. Lying on this is considered perjury. The home being in his name only appeared to confirm this. If this came to light while he was alive, it could have been treated as fraud. However since he is deceased, nothing can be done about it. I'm sorry, but that's reality.
I am so sorry, yes its your home but its not your house. Only your husband was on the deed. He could have sold it right out from under you. RMs are like a lien. They loaned your husband money, now he is gone, they want it back. If you can't give it back, then the house has to be sold and the lien satisfied. Hopefully you'll have enough from the proceeds to buy a nice house. I would not wait too much longer or you may lose the house.
This whole sad case shows that we cannot be "the little woman" who doesn't know and understand fully the finances. If we are, this sort of thing can happen, pulling any security we could have after a sad loss into more loss. Awful way to have things go, and I surely hope others take note. You must KNOW what's going on in the finances of your own marriage.
TreeTree, Thanks for letting us know that you were never on the deed of this home, despite its purchase during your marriage. That is a terrible lesson to all the rest of us. If we are in a marriage then our name needs to be on mortgage and deed when a home is bought.
You have had two attorneys now tell you that there is no option save for you to sell this home, now yours by inheritance from hubby. It has a loan that came due with his death, which is what basically a Reverse Mortgage is. Somehow without your knowledge he had been receiving monthly payments for some amount of time from this "loan". That now is due. It is another sad lesson to others: Know the finances of your marriage. You cannot afford not to.
The Reverse Mortgage company apparently, in the view of your attorneys did their own due diligence. Your husband lied. You weren't on any deed registered on public documents. They made the loan, and they sent him the money. Too late to punish HIM as he's dead; punishment enough.
I am so sorry, but take your attorney's advice, sell, pay off that loan, and use the remained to buy a less expensive place, or to rent, whichever will work for you. Very sad that hubby tricked you in this manner, and tricked the company, but they could hardly be expected to hire private detectives to check his marriages and such. They acted in good faith; he lied. And the chickens are home to roost now with this loan needing to be paid off.
This is a sad story, and I am very sorry this happened to you.
I had a friend that was divorced for 20 years with her house in her name! I called her when I saw a settlement notice for her house to her ex! He pretended to buy her house and got a mortgage on her property! It took her $30,000 and 3 years to get her property legally in her name again! She got it settled before she died and transferred the deed to her children! Crooks are crooks! They will find a way to deceive anyone! Believe me I live with one!
You are saying that you have TWO attorneys so far and "nothing they say makes sense". I would encourage you to take a trusted friend or family member with you to the attorneys whenever you go, because they are saying SOMETHING, and you aren't able to tell us what it is they have said to you. . I have several times asked you how this home is "held". ARE you on the TITLE of this home? ARE you on the DEED of this home? DID your husband hold this home in his own name before you married? DID you contribute to the paying off of the mortgage of this home? Have you checked your state laws regarding holding home as an asset as a married couple in your state.
You are asking us to believe that two attorneys have told you absolutely nothing that makes sense, yet you cannot repeat what they DID tell you. Clearly there is some reason here, in my mind, that your husband did not have to mention you as regards this home. I cannot certainly figure that out myself.
You have checked and if you are satisfied that you have done EVERYTHING you are able to do under THE LAW, then perhaps it is time to move on. Clearly, if two attorneys are of no help to you whatsoever, a Forum of clueless strangers from all around the country and a few other countries as well can't right this for you.
I am terribly sorry we can't be of more help. I am terribly sorry this happened to you. But other than suggest you go to the law, which you tell us you have TWICE done, I am afraid there is no recourse here I can think of. Again, I am so sorry. This unfortunately makes little sense. And of course we cannot know the details.
I was not on the deed to the home but we bought it while we were married, and did not sign any papers for a reverse mortgage, one lawyer is bankruptcy and the other one told me to just sellm and pay off the loan and yes i helped pay bills until my husband got so ill I could not work I stayed home with him 96% of the time the last 4 years
I hope you can get back to us about what an attorney has told you Treetree. It's always a little disconcerting to get repeat stories or ongoing stories in which suggestions made, without a response, and then another 6 months down the line another question mirroring the first, with apparently no attorney followup. At some point it will be too late to address. I have no idea statutes of limitations on this one. Still............
Again, hope you will respond to us here. Again wishing you the best of luck.
yes I did and i consulted with a lawyer and nothing has been done he just says sell your house in fact its the second lawyer the first lied and was not even aloud to be practicing law so i have read everything i get get my hands on no one seems to care
You really need a lawyer for this. Your husband may have committee fraud, or the reverse mortgage company may have committed fraud, or they may have colluded to commit fraud. But that's something for a lawyer to sort out for you, and to tell you have you can address whatever negative consequences this is causing for you. I hope you can get it sorted out.
I tried to talk to my lawyer but he just told me to sell my home pay off the reverse mortgage! no one can understand that i was married if the PPH reverse mortgage would of done their job finding out if he was married this would not be a problem
Yes, you asked this question last year. Are you having problems because he did this? Were you on the deed? Are you going to lose the house because now he is gone they are asking for their money back?
I think you got two responses last year and thats because we are laymen and have no idea the in and outs of Reversed Mortgages. You need a lawyer to straighten this out. Especially if your husband was told to put down he was single or divorced by the Mortgage company.
You last asked us this in June of 2024. They DID ask your husband if he was married. He said he was not. He lied. As to what the Reverse Mortgage company is to do with liars, I am uncertain? I doubt the pull the marriage certificates of everyone applying, and I doubt if they look then for divorce documents, and etc. What their obligation is to be CERTAIN I don't know. I would THINK that they would have an "obligation" to check a deed. But deeds aren't always the last words in assets as "defined" by a state.
I am very sorry that this happened to you, but this happened some time ago. My question is, what have you done about this? I must assume, that--since last June--you have consulted an attorney. What did this attorney tell you about the LEGAL obligations of a Reverse Mortgage Company and about the title of the home, and about your husband's capability of locking you out of any knowledge about this.
The attorney is the one who KNOWS. We are just a bunch of folks out her pounding away on our keyboards, with an opinion. What have you done about consulting an attorney? What did he/she tell you? Just a quick check on the internet gets you this: "Reverse mortgage companies have an obligation to check for the marriage of the applicant. An eligible non-borrowing spouse is an individual who is married to a reverse mortgage applicant when the loan closes and will not be a borrower of that loan but is living in the subject property as their primary residence1." So I guess what we have here is what is the definition of "checking". I would think that tax forms, whether filing married, filing separate, or married, filing married, might serve. I just don't know what they LEGALLY must check. Seems you could have a case here. WHAT does the ATTORNEY say?
my attorney said sell the house and pay off the loan ! yes he lied and i found out after he passed i think the mortgage company should of checked, and we always file taxes together i was not yet 62 at that time, and since then i had to file bankruptcy to stop the foreclosure, i had read every thing this is a stress matter thats making me sick
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
The answer is "Who knows why they didn't check?"
Maybe ask, "Why didn't my husband put my name on the mortgage? Why didn't my husband tell me about the RM? Why did my husband tell a lie that would screw me over from beyond the grave?"
Again, "Who knows?"
But you now have to move through this very distressing problem.
If you have to sell the house to pay off the RM, you won't wind up with a house no matter what. Consider letting it go into foreclosure and then walk away to begin a fresh start.
I wish you clarity, wisdom and peace in your heart that you cannot change what has transpired but that you can still have a worthwhile future.
THEY aren't the bad guys here. Hubby is. Being dead it's too late to do anything about them. There is now a loan that has come due. Attorneys were consulted. It is (sadly) over. ALL the sympathy in the world with this poor gal. She chose the wrong man. But it is done, and she can't change it. She can hate the RM company all she likes, and she can hate hubby as well. That just won't change the loan that's come due. And hatred will eat the liver....so.....
File a Complaint:
You can file a complaint with the Texas Department of Insurance and the Federal Housing Finance Agency (FHFA).
Seek Legal Advice:
Consult with an attorney specializing in reverse mortgages and consumer protection to understand your rights and options.
Key Considerations:
Honesty is Essential:
It's crucial to be truthful and transparent with lenders about your marital status and other relevant information.
Due Diligence:
Lenders should conduct thorough due diligence to verify the information provided by borrowers.
Thanks for letting us know that you were never on the deed of this home, despite its purchase during your marriage. That is a terrible lesson to all the rest of us. If we are in a marriage then our name needs to be on mortgage and deed when a home is bought.
You have had two attorneys now tell you that there is no option save for you to sell this home, now yours by inheritance from hubby. It has a loan that came due with his death, which is what basically a Reverse Mortgage is. Somehow without your knowledge he had been receiving monthly payments for some amount of time from this "loan". That now is due. It is another sad lesson to others: Know the finances of your marriage. You cannot afford not to.
The Reverse Mortgage company apparently, in the view of your attorneys did their own due diligence. Your husband lied. You weren't on any deed registered on public documents. They made the loan, and they sent him the money. Too late to punish HIM as he's dead; punishment enough.
I am so sorry, but take your attorney's advice, sell, pay off that loan, and use the remained to buy a less expensive place, or to rent, whichever will work for you. Very sad that hubby tricked you in this manner, and tricked the company, but they could hardly be expected to hire private detectives to check his marriages and such. They acted in good faith; he lied. And the chickens are home to roost now with this loan needing to be paid off.
This is a sad story, and I am very sorry this happened to you.
THANK YOU for responding to us.
You are saying that you have TWO attorneys so far and "nothing they say makes sense".
I would encourage you to take a trusted friend or family member with you to the attorneys whenever you go, because they are saying SOMETHING, and you aren't able to tell us what it is they have said to you.
.
I have several times asked you how this home is "held".
ARE you on the TITLE of this home?
ARE you on the DEED of this home?
DID your husband hold this home in his own name before you married?
DID you contribute to the paying off of the mortgage of this home?
Have you checked your state laws regarding holding home as an asset as a married couple in your state.
You are asking us to believe that two attorneys have told you absolutely nothing that makes sense, yet you cannot repeat what they DID tell you.
Clearly there is some reason here, in my mind, that your husband did not have to mention you as regards this home. I cannot certainly figure that out myself.
You have checked and if you are satisfied that you have done EVERYTHING you are able to do under THE LAW, then perhaps it is time to move on.
Clearly, if two attorneys are of no help to you whatsoever, a Forum of clueless strangers from all around the country and a few other countries as well can't right this for you.
I am terribly sorry we can't be of more help.
I am terribly sorry this happened to you.
But other than suggest you go to the law, which you tell us you have TWICE done, I am afraid there is no recourse here I can think of.
Again, I am so sorry.
This unfortunately makes little sense.
And of course we cannot know the details.
It's always a little disconcerting to get repeat stories or ongoing stories in which suggestions made, without a response, and then another 6 months down the line another question mirroring the first, with apparently no attorney followup. At some point it will be too late to address. I have no idea statutes of limitations on this one. Still............
Again, hope you will respond to us here.
Again wishing you the best of luck.
Yes, you asked this question last year. Are you having problems because he did this? Were you on the deed? Are you going to lose the house because now he is gone they are asking for their money back?
I think you got two responses last year and thats because we are laymen and have no idea the in and outs of Reversed Mortgages. You need a lawyer to straighten this out. Especially if your husband was told to put down he was single or divorced by the Mortgage company.
They DID ask your husband if he was married.
He said he was not.
He lied.
As to what the Reverse Mortgage company is to do with liars, I am uncertain? I doubt the pull the marriage certificates of everyone applying, and I doubt if they look then for divorce documents, and etc.
What their obligation is to be CERTAIN I don't know.
I would THINK that they would have an "obligation" to check a deed. But deeds aren't always the last words in assets as "defined" by a state.
I am very sorry that this happened to you, but this happened some time ago.
My question is, what have you done about this?
I must assume, that--since last June--you have consulted an attorney. What did this attorney tell you about the LEGAL obligations of a Reverse Mortgage Company and about the title of the home, and about your husband's capability of locking you out of any knowledge about this.
The attorney is the one who KNOWS. We are just a bunch of folks out her pounding away on our keyboards, with an opinion.
What have you done about consulting an attorney?
What did he/she tell you?
Just a quick check on the internet gets you this:
"Reverse mortgage companies have an obligation to check for the marriage of the applicant. An eligible non-borrowing spouse is an individual who is married to a reverse mortgage applicant when the loan closes and will not be a borrower of that loan but is living in the subject property as their primary residence1."
So I guess what we have here is what is the definition of "checking". I would think that tax forms, whether filing married, filing separate, or married, filing married, might serve. I just don't know what they LEGALLY must check.
Seems you could have a case here. WHAT does the ATTORNEY say?