So angry with the hospice social worker.

OK, my older brother and my nephew have Social Security Disability (SSDI) for mental issues, and have for 20 yrs. The only way they got it was using a Disability lawyer. If you pay the MINIMUM on all your bills, you cannot b forced out of your home. The key is to make A SINCERE EFFORT.

Get some critical payments made MONDAY. Drop off checks in person, or electronically pay, which is even faster. Start hunting for a Disability Lawyer! I've learned the hard way that Govt. assistance is so frustrating and seems impossible, but once you get into the system, it starts the ball rolling!

Get on line and apply for SNAP benefits first. They will schedule a phone interview with an assigned "Worker" within a week, and it's 5 minutes that will change your life! Get your proof, medical documents or whatever ready for it. Tell them you have NO INCOME AND ARE DESPERATE.

Next is find a Disability lawyer, for SSDI. It may take a month, but once that goes through, then it gets done. While all this is happening, keep Mom away for that Social Worker. Or even better, ask for a new one. You may have autism, but you come across as intelligent and concerned. Your Mom sounds like she is going downhill fast. I can imagine this is terrible pressure on you.

I would make appt. at your mortgage company, to go tell them what you are trying to do. Don't panic at $2,000 in bills, it's not THAT bad. Most Lenders will let you slide on the mortgage up to 6 months if you have a serious situation, which you DO. Make a folder with Mom's medical info and yours. Make copies of each document at the local UPS store. Carry them with you, to bring proof of you being on the Title/Deed, the RECORDED copy (showing Joint Tenants) from thee County. Also keep your original documents in a folder, making sure you have them when needed. Buy a accordion type folder cheap with 8 sections to keep it all in.

You should have been on SSDI years ago. Mom must be getting some form of Social Security income as well? If you can get your SSDI going, you could stay in the house after Mom is gone. But your best bet will be to sell it, buy a mobile home and rent a space in a local mobile park.

You can do this, but I know it is frustrating. I think you Mom made have told that SW some crazy stories, why SW doesn't trust you. Ignore this SW and get moving on partial payments on bills, and keeping Mom away from her. Get that SNAP card first, then apply for SSDI. Start looking for mobile homes/trailers, don't waste money on an RV, which requires gas, insurance, maintenance and a legal place to park it. That is no way to live. An RV will not be a suitable place to live long term and waste your money. You will have nice people around you in a mobile park, to continue your journey after Mom is gone.

Get that For Sale sign down. Tell any agent NO SIGNS, they can't sell the normal way. You can get possible Buyers interested, but cannot close any deal until Mom is gone. If your POA states you can "Buy or Sell Real Property" that is the only way. Until then, you are still HALF OWNER, as long as you have a RECORDED COPY of the Deed/Title showing you and Mom as Joint Tenants. If you haven't got it recorded, take it to the County and get it done NOW. It is worthless until it is RECORDED AND STAMPED.

I'm sorry you are having to go through this.

What about a reverse mortgage?

Check with some local community charities and see whether they can give you a one-time grant to catch you up on your bills. Often that will do that to keep a family from falling into homelessness over relatively small amounts of money. That may keep you from needing to sell the house. They can also usually refer you to a social worker who can help you with other benefits such as SNAP and Meals on Wheels, possibly assistance with utilities.

You need a lawyer to help you. There is legal aide for people who don't have money. Your Office of Aging may have their number.

Since it seems your Mom created the PoA properly I would refer the social worker to that same elder law attorney if they have any further questions. Or, you will have to lawyer up if someone files another complaint about you. Make sure you have all legal ducks in a row, have your own original copy of the PoA (and make sure social services gets a copy if they ask for it), and make sure your PoA authority is actually activated per the PoA document requirement (if any, and often it is 1 formal medical diagnosis by her doctor, on clinic letterhead and signed by the diagnosing doctor).

If your Mom's cognitive state took a nosedive she may be telling the social worker things that aren't true which, if she as dementia, is a very common dementia behavior. Dementia can include paranoia, delusions and confabulations.

Please resist acting out your frustration with social services -- they have a lot of power and you need their help. Be very patient and accommodating with them.

Let us know how it goes, since updates are extremely helpful to many on this forum.

Can you talk with the social worker about getting a referral to an agency that can help you sign up for housing, benefits, and finding a job? Your mother needs her income and you will need income going forward since your mother will no longer be supporting you.

If your name is on the Title as a Joint Tenant, that is the old fashioned, cheap way to ensure Rights of Survivorship, instead of paying a few thousand for a Trust.

You are co-owner (Joint Tenant) of the house, if the Grant Deed was recorded. You can't technically sell it yourself, until Mom dies and you become the Sole Owner. Mom is unable to make decisions, why you had to get a POA. Right now the house is 50/50 ownership.

Where is Mom's monthly income? She must have been paying for her house, taxes and utilities for a long time. You living there (unemployed with no income) is not the problem. It is Mom's "dementia/confusion" about being unable to legally sign documents. The HOSPICE Social Worker tells us that Mom is in Hospice? The Social Worker thinks you are not trustworthy for whatever reason. It doesn't sound right that you both have obviously been living there and Mom paying for it. Why suddenly "we have no money?" You can't even pay utilities?

Thanks for clarifying. If the POA is properly and legally done, make sure you have the documentation required, such as statements from doctors or whatever else is required. Read what it says you are permitted to do regarding the house. You should probably go back to the lawyer and ask him or her to send a letter to APS telling them that you have proper authority and they should cease and desist from interfering. Also have the lawyer explain to you what you can and can't do with the house and the money from the sale of the house. For example, if the house is in your mother's name only, then you must save the money from the sale for her care, not spend it on yourself, and keep careful records. If you anticipate that she will need Medicaid, or she is on it, there are laws regarding that to make sure that you know about as they are complicated.

I hope everyone involved in this situation will communicate clearly and listen to each other so that the situation will be smooth rather than stressful going forward.

The attorney we met with questioned her and she acknowledged that she understood what she was doing, she was still competent until about the middle of last month when her mental state declined but we did this back at the beginning of February

No, you cannot do Power of Attorney "by myself with a lawyer." Only your mother can decide to assign you her Power of Attorney, and she would have to still be competent and she would have to meet with the lawyer and have her signature on the document notarized as required by the law in your state.

Did the lawyer draw up the document and somehow tell you it was now legal for you to use? Or did he/she draw up the document but tell you that your mother would need to come in and actually sign it?

Who owns the house -- whose name is on the deed? Is it paid for or does it still have a mortgage? Where is your mother now, in hospice in a facility, or living at the house?

You clearly have no understanding of what a POA is, what you can do and what you cannot. You are in danger, legally. You could be imprisoned if you follow through on any of this without legal guardianship.

You did the POA illegally.
So yes, this is a large problem and you should consult an attorney at once.
You cannot do a POA on a confused or demented person without his or her being legally competent and present. If an attorney suggested to you that this could be done it is malpractice and said attorney will almost certainly lose their license.

See an attorney at once.
Make no attempt to sell this home with these fraudulent papers. Take the sign down at once. This can be considered Elder Abuse and you can serve prison time for it.