A couple of weeks ago we had a good question about caregiver dreams but I haven’t been able to find it. This is not in the form of a question but my dream last night was so interesting to me. Caregiver dreams can’t be rare since caregiving is so psychologically impactful - I hope you’ll share yours too.
This morning, after a full day of schlepping loads of furniture to the AL facility with my DD, I fell into bed sore and exhausted at 1 a.m. In my dream, as in my waking, my arm was aching so badly I could barely move it. With great effort I tried to raise it and noticed that the ball of my shoulder was detached from the socket and sort of lumping out under the flesh of my underarm and totally useless. I wasn’t in great pain in the dream, just tired and sad.
What could be more literal than that? I’m losing my Right Arm.
I DO love dreams.
I have read that if you dream of being inside a house, the house represents yourself; what’s going on in your own mind. I don’t know about a garden, but I think the way you interact with your mother in your dream is beautiful and a bit poignant.
I notice that the floor tile (burnished brick; running bond; beautiful patina) needs work and I remember that I may have some from another project that would work nicely and I can probably do it myself.
Then I’m outside walking to the house that I still live in - it’s only two doors down, but some kind of ragged, drooping trees are hanging over the sidewalk, making it a little difficult to walk. I’m brushing them aside and thinking someone needs to get out there and trim them up for safety. Or maybe I’ll have to do it myself even though they aren’t on my property. I wake up while I’m still under the trees and cannot see my house.
My mother and I are gardening together in the back yard. She has the hose and is standing to my left watering, and I'm on hands and knees in front of the hydrangea, pulling weeds from around it's roots.
At which point look up at her (she's about 40 in this one, still very lovely) and say to her, "Francie? I think these might actually be flowers; do you remember. And she says "Yes", they are; they're weeds but they DO flower".
I awaken when foster dog, Frieda, jumps on my legs to tell me breakfast is due.
But because the dream is still so real, having been kind of shocked out of it, I remember this garden vividly.
It isn't any of Mom's, and it isn't any I ever had, but I have had dreams of this place often before. I can see the yard, now. There, a garden next door that has a large tree with small treehouse up in it. Beautiful old weathered fencing everywhere. It's an exceptionally lovely place.
It would be typical of us that Mom/Francie is watering and nurturing, and I am
WEEDING, try to control the bad stuff, ha ha. I only called her Francie at the end.
So, what garden is that? Whose is it? Was I once there in another life? Did I make it up.
And that dream world! Why this one? Why now?
Last night this person who doesn't do TV medium anymore much sat and watched LA burn. Watched all the loss. Watched all the heroism. A man leaving his packed car to assist getting an old man with Parkinson's down a hill to safety (yes, his car burned with all his saved possessions, and he knew it would. All the heroism. All the dreadful loss.
Did I just make myself a garden to go to where the weeds will bloom?
I have been told they can be very effective and have a friend that can not sleep wothout hers on.
I usually write down the main keywords and tricky phrases right away. Then as I take my shower, I flesh out the dream story and then write down the rest after getting dressed.
I have a collection of pretty cool dreams. Some are very cool inventions others are of a religious nature.
Unfortunately, my cool dreams have subsided since sleeping with one eye open and listening for my wife to go wandering through the house looking for voices. I don't allow myself to get very much deep sleep. I know that's hurting me. But I just can't help it.
I do have to pray a lot to combat high anxiety dreams.
I have on and off had the most vivid and accurate dream / premonitions as long as I can remember .
I hate it when they come true , which I have lost count how many have .
I find the messages in our dream world so profound, and always have. I absolutely love the dream world.
Losing your right arm also has meaning. It means you just can't do it. You have no right arm. You are helpless, and just "can't do it". As in "I can't be your right hand man because I no longer have a right hand".