My father lost our mother 8 years ago and since then the house has become so dirty. The family have tried cleaning it but he gets very angry and tells us to get out, he is 89 years old and still has capacity to make decisions. He is very stubborn. He has a dog which we take out for walks around 3 to 4 times a week, she is fed well and we'll loved by him. Pads are on the floor for mishaps which we clean up. He is hoarding and he won't let us move or take any items away, the rooms are just so filthy. We have asked him so many times to live with us and he refuses, he says he likes living in his own house. We are worried if something happened to him and the paramedics were called, the state of the place, would we be liable for this?
None of us want to sit and wait for the enedible to happen, but because are parents want to live and die the way they want to in there home. We are waiting for something bad to happen so we can finally get them the help they need.
Or we are waiting for a car accident, because we can't get the keys away, and doctors don't see what we see, in a 15 minutes appointment.
This is many many of are lives.
I will say before your so ready to jump the gun and move dad into your home, think about it long and hard. Once you get them into your home it is next to impossible to get them out. You are talking a probably years of 24/7 caregiving. I would read other posters on here , to see what happens.
You could call APS that may give him a scare to at least help him clean up and his hoarding.
And if there is anyway you get him to re-home the dog, that would be best too.
Best of luck