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Still no brother. Things have worsened. My father in law passed away a year ago and my mom has been living with us full time since 2023. We tried taking her home 04/23 and she planted her face. Unfortunately now i am very sick. My chronic pancreatitis is worsening and last February I was hospitalized for 10 days with double pneumonia. If lee was not here I could never take care of her and trust me she has a million things just in the morning she wants to do. Her mobility issues are awful and she never gets up to go to the bathroom. We were supposed to get away so many times especially with lee retired. But I reached out to my cousins and she called me selfish. The only break i have had since 2006 was staying in the hospital. My cuz said that I can always celebrate my birthday another time- sure and I was just seeing if anyone was interested. Our whole house is depressing and we living here are all depressed. I would love to have time with my husband-too much info but it’s been 3 years since we have been alone. Then he doesn’t want to go anywhere because he doesn’t feel comfortable leaving her. It don’t matter now I am tired. I am trying to find care for 3-4 days while we go to Tennessee. I wanted to see if I could find a place for respite care and I am not having any success. My cousin had to remind me that with the weather what if they can’t get to her. We do have a renter for all that. But I would love any suggestions to find a respite facility and cost. Thank you all for everything you do for your loved ones I am so grateful for this forum also it’s been so hard and I am happy i came across you guys again

Find Care & Housing
Do a browser search just like this:

"respite care facilities near me"

...and include the quote marks. You can also do

"respite care facilities near+(insert your zip code)"

Or, Care.com

or, contact your local Area Agency on Aging for resources.
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Reply to Geaton777
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I'm a recent arrival here so I don't know your backstory. But can't you place your mother in a facility, full-time, so you can focus on your own health and family? If she is depressed living with you she would probably benefit from the activities and some PT/OT/suitable exercises in assisted living. Can her home be sold to help pay for it? I'm sorry for all you've been through and are going through.
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Reply to MG8522
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I am so sorry. Condolences on your loss and on your gain of the movein.
I think that you already know, as a sufferer of pancreatitis, just how firmly this can co-react with mental stress? Mental stress has an ENORMOUS impact on this condition.

I do very much hope that you will not throw your very life OR your health and well being on the burning funeral pyre of this elder, but know you are an adult and responsible for your own choices. Respite isn't going to be enough, but I am very grateful you will at least get that for yourself.

Short of calling all care centers in your area I wouldn't have a clue where to start. I surely do wish you the best of luck.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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