My mom (on two separate occasions) has told me that somebody stole her charger. Then she would borrow a charger from somebody and then she'd find her charger again, it just miraculously appeared.
Yesterday, she said she lost her phone and her charger. She was extremely upset and had a staff member call me to let me know of the situation. The AL employee said that she'd help my mom look later because the roommate was sleeping. Thirty minutes later, the staff member called me back and let me know that my mom found the phone & charger in a tote bag that my mom keeps snacks in (in her room). She said my mom was crying and said she missed my dad and that she felt like she was going crazy. I thanked the employee for calling me and letting me know.
A few hours later, 10:30 at night, my mom called me five times leaving messages that she KNOWS people are stealing her phone and that we "need to have a little talk!" I know this little talk is for her to demand me to take her out of the AL facility and drive her back to her home which is only 1.5 miles away! She also told me in the message that the employees thinks "she's crazy" but she knows that people are stealing. She has also stated that somebody stole her beloved electric razor that was my dad's.
I live out of state and am here to spend a nice "Mother's Day" and my b-day with her and to also help clean out the home (of 47 years) to get it ready to be sold due to the expensive upkeep of an empty home! Oh, the stresses!!!
I would be very careful about considering even a visit to help clean out the house for your mom, instead perhaps bring something with you each visit while your there that brings home to her at the AL facility and use that time to "set things up" there to be comfortable and familiar. If she is still adjusting to this change taking her back may only set that process back. Such a difficult time for both of you, in particular it must be overwhelming for you I hope you know you have support here, I'm sending lots of positive strength your way. Hugs
I will somehow mark her charger w/ some cute duck tape and maybe buy some monogram initials for her phone, or something of that nature! Thanks for the "recognition" ideas!!
Have you discussed her distress with the staff? How to they perceive her ability to relax and adjust to the facility? Are they able to meet her needs there?
I'd likely discuss her condition with her doctor to see if she could benefit from medication. My LO used to cry a lot and was very worried and upset, until she went on a daily med for depression and anxiety. It really helped her become more content.
I agree that maybe she is a little too anxious and might need something to calm her down a little bit so that she doesn't get so upset.
I think that she is obviously declining and she is scared. She may need a check up and she may need a higher level of care. At this point in her life things will change and because you are a safe person you will get the calls.
Is there a reason for Mom to have a phone? Because, it seems more of a problem. It really isn't fair that staff has to constantly hunt for it. ALs don't have or need the staff that LTC facilities have. Hunting for Moms phone is taking time away from other residents. Is Mom on any meds for anxiety? She may need something. Her calling you is going to get worse. It may be time to "lose" the phone. But if you do "lose" it make the staff aware so they don't go looking for it. My daughter says when this happens where she works, they have to investigate a "lost" phone.